In the quiet corners of Australian homes, a ‘silent crisis’ is unfolding, one that rarely makes headlines or sparks public outrage. It is a crisis that sees older women, often the matriarchs of their families, facing a threat from within their own homes.
According to a tally by the online feminist group Destroy the Joint, 14 women over the age of 55 were allegedly killed in domestic violence-related homicides last year. This figure, alarming as it is, may rise when the Australian Bureau of Statistics releases its data for the year.
Meanwhile, in 2023, the ABS data recorded that 28 women aged 55 or older were allegedly killed in domestic violence-related homicides, accounting for approximately one-third of the total.
This disturbing trend has been labelled a ‘silent crisis’ by experts, who point out that the deaths of older women due to family violence receive far less attention than those of younger women and are often overlooked in government responses to violence against women.
Catherine Barrett, director of Celebrate Ageing, expresses a stark reality: ‘There is a matricide of older women [and] people are not even noticing, there is no outcry. There is silence. It is just being missed.’
A Guardian analysis of government data over the past decade reveals that nearly 200 women over the age of 55 were allegedly killed in family violence-related homicides. This suggests that older women could be at dual risk – from partners and their children, particularly their sons.
While the overall rate of alleged domestic homicides in the country has more than halved in the past 30 years, the rate at which older women are allegedly killed has not seen a consistent decline. Over the past decade, the rate of women aged 55 and older killed in family violence homicides has reached 0.7 deaths per 100,000 on three occasions, equalling the rate for all women 30 years ago.
The number of alleged parricides – instances of parents being killed – was also consistently high over the past 25 years, and even increased in recent years.
Women appear more likely to be victims of their children than men, with sons being the overwhelming majority of alleged offenders.
According to the Australian Institute of Criminology National Homicide Monitoring Program’s data, 61 mothers in the country were allegedly killed by their children in the 10 years to mid-2023, with sons as the alleged offenders at 75 per cent. In comparison, 52 fathers in the country were allegedly killed by their children in the same period.
This problem is not unique to Australia, though. It is reportedly a global issue, with similar trends observed in England and Wales.
Yumi Lee, the chief executive of the Older Women’s Network NSW, highlights the disparity in attention given to family violence homicides, noting that the media and public often focus on the deaths of younger, attractive white women, while the deaths of marginalised women, including older women, are overlooked.
‘It is horrifying, but it did not surprise me at all, because violence against women knows no age barrier… The invisibility and the marginalisation of First Nations women [and] older women means that they remain invisible even when they’re killed,’ Lee says.
‘When we talk about violence against women, it is always a younger woman fleeing with two little kids hanging around her knees. You rarely see any commentary about all the women who grow old with violence, who live with, maybe, sons who are violent. They are really invisible.’
The cost-of-living crisis and mental health issues have reportedly exacerbated the problem, with sons moving back in with their mothers and perpetuating violence.
‘The mothers are not reporting their sons … because this is their son, and it is shame on the family, and they are worried about his mental health,’ says Barrett.
Lee and Barrett are calling for a life stages approach to address the different ways family violence can affect older women.
While the government’s National Plan to Reduce Violence against Women and Their Children does acknowledge the increased risk of violence for older women and recommends increasing access to safe and affordable long-term housing, Lee emphasises the need for explicit policies and services that help older women specifically.
Meanwhile, Barrett wants to see a change in policy and service delivery. She also wants to see some anger and outrage from politicians, community leaders, and the public.
‘The absence of outrage is part of the problem and I am calling that out as ageist,’ she says.
Do you or someone you know need help and support? The crisis support service Lifeline is on 13 11 14 and the national family violence counselling service is on 1800 737 732. Other international helplines can be found at www.befrienders.org.
Our YourLifeChoices readers, what are your thoughts on this ‘silent crisis’ affecting women in the older demographic?
Also read: Crime on the rise, suggests ABS data
