Here are 19 unusual computer viruses of which to steer clear but at which you can still have a giggle! The Woody Allen Virus is our favourite. Which is yours?
Ellen Degeneres virus
Your IBM suddenly claims it’s a MAC.
Monica Lewinsky virus
Sucks all the memory out of your computer.
Makes your whole computer go down.
Everything in the computer goes Goofy.
Mike Tyson virus
Quits after one byte.
Screws up your RAM but your processor doesn’t care.
Lorena Bobbit virus
Turns your hard disk into a 3.5-inch floppy.
Woody Allen virus
Bypasses the motherboard and turns on daughter card.
Spice Girl virus
Has no real function, but makes a pretty desktop.
Ronald Reagan virus
Saves your data, but forgets where it is stored.
Oprah Winfrey virus
Your 200MB hard drive suddenly shrinks to 80MB, and then slowly expands to 300MB.
Arnold Schwarzenegger virus
Terminates and stays resident … It’ll be back.
The Telstra virus
Causes leased lines to be taken out of service, issues a denial that it had anything to do with it, and then sends an invoice to prove it.
The Dyslexia virus
Messes about with your flies.
The Star Trek virus
Boldly goes where no virus has gone before.
The Winona Ryder virus
Turns your floppy disks into hard ones.
The Volvo virus
Enables disks to survive severe head crashes, but slows processor, impossible to get rid of, and goes on forever.
The Kylie Minogue virus
Infects all your files for a period of time, then disappears completely without trace.
The Mussollini virus
Hangs your system – from a lamppost.