A doctor races an old man in this week’s best jokes.
A doctor goes out and buys the best car on the market, a brand new Ferrari GTO valued at $3 million. He takes it out for a spin and stops at a red light. An old man on a moped pulls up next to him. The old man looks over at the sleek shiny car and asks, “What kind of car have you got there, sonny?”
The doctor replies, “A Ferrari GTO. It cost $3 million dollars!”
“That’s a lot of money,” says the old man. “Why does it cost so much?”
“Because this car can do up to 300 kilometres an hour!” states the doctor proudly.
The moped driver asks, “Mind if I take a look inside?”
“No problem,” replies the doctor.
The old man pokes his head in the window and looks around. Then, sitting back on his moped, the old man says, “That’s a pretty nice car, but I’ll stick with my moped!”
Then the light changes, so the doctor decides to show the old man just what his car can do. He floors it, and within 10 seconds, the speedometer reads 150kmh. Suddenly, he notices a dot in his rear view mirror … and suddenly something whips by him going much faster!
“What on earth could be going faster than my Ferrari?” the doctor asks himself.
He floors the accelerator and takes the Ferrari up to 200kmh. Then, up ahead of him, he sees that it is the old man on the moped! Amazed that the moped could pass his Ferrari, he gives it more gas and passes the moped at 250kmh.
He is feeling pretty good until he looks in his mirror and sees the old man gaining on him AGAIN! Astounded by the speed of this old guy, the doctor floors the gas pedal and takes the Ferrari all the way up to 300kmh. Not 10 seconds later, he sees the moped bearing down on him again! The Ferrari is flat out, and there is nothing that he can do! Suddenly, the moped ploughs into the back of his Ferrari, demolishing the rear end. The doctor stops, jumps out and, unbelievably, finds the old man is still alive.
He says to the mangled old man, “Oh my gosh! Is there anything I can do for you?”
The old man whispers, “Unhook my suspenders from your side mirror.”
In the early days, everyone owned horses and only the rich people owned cars. These days everyone owns cars and only the rich own horses.
My, how the stables have turned!
A teacher asks her class, "What do you want to be when you grow up?"
Little Johnny says, "I want to be a billionaire, go to the most expensive clubs, take the wife with me, give her a Ferrari worth over a million bucks, an apartment in Hawaii, a mansion in Paris, a jet to travel through Europe, an Infinite Visa Card and I want to make love to her three times a day."
The teacher, very shocked, decides not to dwell on what Johnny had just said and asks, "And you, Susie?”
Susie says, "I want to be Johnny's wife."
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