Friday, March 29, 2024
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Head over heels humour

My wife called me at work on Valentine’s Day.
She said: “Three of the girls in my office have been sent flowers. They’re absolutely gorgeous!”
I replied: “That’s probably why they were sent flowers then.”

•••

My wife told me she didn’t want anything extravagant for Valentine’s Day this year, just some chocolate and a few little surprises. I can’t help but wonder if she’s confused it with Easter.

•••

After taking my girlfriend out for a lovely dinner and giving her 12 long-stem roses, she called to the thank me for the “most memorable Valentine’s Day ever!”
While I appreciated the thought, I can’t help but think that she has underestimated Al Capone’s effort.

•••

This year I bought my husband a present that took his breath away … a treadmill.

•••

For the last 20 years I’ve received a Valentine’s Day card from a secret admirer. So, I was disappointed this year when I didn’t get one. First my gran dies, and now this.

•••

My wife said I’d better have something planned for Valentine’s Day.
“Yes!” I told her, “I’m thinking of taking down the Christmas decorations.”

•••

I gave blood today. It may not be the best Valentine’s Day present, but at least it came from the heart.

•••

This Valentine’s Day I made cupcakes and bought fancy chocolates for a special someone … me.

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Liv Gardiner
Liv Gardiner
Writer and editor with interests in travel, lifestyle, health, wellbeing, astrology and the enivornment.
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