Saturday, March 30, 2024
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Did I read that sign right?

In case you ever thought that grammar and punctuation do not matter, these editorial faux pas will make you think again.

 

A sign in a restaurant loo:

Toilet out of order. Please use floor below.

__

In a Laundromat:

Automatic washing machines: please remove all your clothes when the light goes out.

__

In a London department store:

Bargain basement upstairs.

__

In an office:

Would the person who took the step ladder yesterday please bring it back or further steps will be taken.

__

In another office:

After tea break staff should empty the teapot and stand upside down on the draining board.

__

Outside a second hand shop:

We exchange anything – bicycles, washing machines, etc. Why not bring your wife along and get a wonderful bargain?

__

Notice in health food shop window:

Closed due to illness.

__

Spotted in a safari park:

Elephants, please stay in your car.

__

Seen during a conference:

For anyone who has children and doesn’t know it, there is a day care on the first floor.

__

Notice in a farmer’s field:

The farmer allows walkers to cross the field for free, but the bull charges.

__

Message on a leaflet:

If you cannot read, this leaflet will tell you how to get lessons.

__

On a repair shop door:

We can repair anything. (Please knock hard on the door – the bell doesn’t work).

Click NEXT to read some hilarious headlines.

Headlines that confirm proofreading is a dying art:

Man kills self before shooting wife and daughter

[Is that even possible?]

__

Something went wrong in jet crash, expert says

[Really?] 

__

Police begin campaign to run down jaywalkers

[Now, that’s taking things a bit far!]

__

Panda mating fails; veterinarian takes over.

[What a guy.]

__

Miners refuse to work after death

[Wouldn’t you?]

__

Juvenile court to try shooting defendant

[See if that works any better than a fair trial.]

__

War dims hope for peace

[I can see where it might have that effect.]

__

If strike isn’t settled quickly, it may last awhile.

[Really?]

__

Cold wave linked to temperatures

[Who would have thought.]

__

Enfield (London) couple slain; police suspect homicide.

[They may be on to something.]

__

Red tape holds up new bridges

[You mean there’s something stronger than duct tape?]

__

Man struck by lightning: faces battery charge.

[He probably is the battery charge.]

__

New study of obesity looks for larger test group.

[Weren’t they obese enough?]

__

Astronaut takes blame for gas in spacecraft

[That’s what he gets for eating those beans!]

__

Hospitals are sued by seven foot doctors.

[Boy, are they tall!] 

__

And the winner is:

Typhoon rips through cemetery; hundreds dead.

[Did I read that right?]

YourLifeChoices Writers
YourLifeChoices Writershttp://www.yourlifechoices.com.au/
YourLifeChoices' team of writers specialise in content that helps Australian over-50s make better decisions about wealth, health, travel and life. It's all in the name. For 22 years, we've been helping older Australians live their best lives.
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