This one is thanks to Ruth B.
A dentist noticed that his next patient, a little old lady, was nervous, so he decided to tell her a little joke as he put on his gloves.
’Do you know how they make these gloves?’ he asked.
‘No, I don’t,’ she replied.
‘Well,’ he spoofed, ‘there’s a building in Queensland with a big tank of latex and workers of all hand sizes walk up to the tank, dip in their hands, let them dry, then peel off the gloves and throw them into boxes of the right size.’
She didn’t crack a smile.
‘Oh, well. I tried,’ he thought.
But five minutes later, during a delicate portion of the procedure, she burst out laughing.
‘What’s so funny?’ he asked.
‘I was just envisioning how condoms are made!’
Now I know why I’m overweight. The shampoo I use, which runs all over my body in the shower, clearly states ‘adds volume’. From now on I am going to shower with Fairy dishwashing liquid which ‘dissolves grease and fat on contact’.
Light travels faster than sound which explains why some people look intelligent until they open their mouths!