When your wife goes missing

What happens when your wife goes missing? Find out with this week’s Friday Funnies.

A distraught husband is filing a report on his missing wife:

Husband: I lost my wife (Misty), she went shopping and still has not reached home yet.

Inspector: What is her height?

Husband: I never noticed.

Inspector: Slim or healthy?

Husband: Not slim, can be healthy.

Inspector: Color of eyes?

Husband: Never noticed.

Inspector: Color of hair?

Husband: Changes according to the season.

Inspector: What was she wearing?

Husband: Pantsuit or dress...I don't remember exactly.

Inspector: Was she going in a car?

Husband: Yes.

Inspector: Tell me the number, name and colour of the car?

Husband: Black Audi A8 with supercharged 3.0 litre V6 engine generating 333 horse power teamed with an eight-speed tiptronic automatic transmission with manual mode. And it has full LED headlights, which use light emitting diodes for all light functions and has a very thin scratch on the front left door.

And then the husband started crying...

Inspector: Don't worry sir, we will find your car...

 

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    COMMENTS

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    ndibs
    20th Jun 2014
    4:05pm
    So what is the joke?
    Most males are technically focussed that way..
    Nightshade
    20th Jun 2014
    6:02pm
    Do you think that there is deeper & underlying desire, on the part of the husband to lose the wife. Perhaps a primal fear of limitations / need to be free - after all primal man was made a wanderer so as to sow his seed & populate. "Populate or perish" seems to be a favorite saying of me - but to what rational ?
    Nightshade
    20th Jun 2014
    6:03pm
    favorite saying of men - sorry dotty me
    Nightshade
    20th Jun 2014
    6:08pm
    Besides & practicality asks - how is he going to get to work the next morning ?
    ndibs
    20th Jun 2014
    4:08pm
    Sadly too close to reality
    Nightshade
    21st Jun 2014
    1:50am
    Billy breaks a window in his neighbors car & his dad gives him a whipping with his belt.

    Dad is under the bonnet of his car, Billy is in the drivers seat, "when I say, turn the key in the ignition Billy," says dad.
    Billy is watching through the gap between the car's body & the bonnet, he sees his dad with his hands on the radiator fan, he turns the key in the ignition. Billy's dad looses a few fingers.
    Nightshade
    21st Jun 2014
    1:51am
    True story.
    Nightshade
    21st Jun 2014
    2:29am
    John & Pete & Alice were watching TV - a fight ensued - as usual - I went in & turned off the TV - everyone got to tell what happened - John the youngest - Pete the middle one & Alice the witness - the boys were all for it - Alice was dubious but said nothing - in the mean time the TV was off & they were missing their favorite program - at some point into the telling of the woe's the boys realized that it was taking a long time & the TV was off & that they were missing their favorite program - we were not 1/2 way through yet & all 3 children were watching the off TV with an expression of concern - finally the story telling session was over we had worked out where it had all gone wrong & vows that it would not happen again were made & the TV went back on.
    I went to the kitchen to do dinner - bingo - a familiar sound - I stuck my head in & asked if everything was okay ? - the children assured me that all was well.
    No time out, no blame, no punishment, they worked it out for themselves.
    Not when she is around she is a pain -
    Nightshade
    21st Jun 2014
    1:58am
    Donny participated in a fight that broke out at the local disco. Donny, Sandra & I walked the same way home at 2.00 a.m. 1967. As a result of his participating in the fight, Donny had a patch of hair missing from the back of his head the size of a 50 cent coin. It looked so funny that every time we looked at it we laughed.
    True story.
    Nightshade
    21st Jun 2014
    2:02am
    A.D.H.D. & RITALIN - child abuse are not the correct, nor adequate words here -
    Doctor Josef Mengele come on down !
    Joycey
    7th Dec 2014
    4:21pm
    1945 -2014 Not funny at all and very biased.
    If Robbie had serious ADHD a caning would not cure his restlessness at all but make it worse. ADHD does not make people into zombies.
    The police in your list seem to be without any ability to reason, or to make a sensible decision.
    If I were Billy and had accidently broken my neighbour's car window I would consider a whipping very unjust. Pocket money deducted to pay for the window would be a better outcome.
    Nomad
    10th Mar 2017
    1:06pm
    1945 to 2014 ''the times are a changin '


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