Friday Funnies goes camping

The caravan holiday is a great Australian tradition. How could it not be, when we’re blessed with endless space and such a wide variety of landscapes?

It’s often a complicated affair though, and anything that can go wrong usually does. Here are some funny yarns from holidaymakers about hitching up the van and hitting the road.

Waterfront real estate

Dad had given in to family nagging and driven the caravan onto the beach for an overnight stay. It was perfect! Mum cooked up dinner on a little gas BBQ while the four of us kids mucked about in the water before settling in for the night, lulled by the sound of the sea. Unfortunately, we woke in the morning surrounded by water as the tide had come in and we were bogged! Luckily, there were a few fishermen in 4WDs who pulled us out at low tide.

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Nana has standards

As a child we holidayed with our caravan every holiday. My nana would join us for the car ride but refused to sleep in the caravan – she always checked into a motel. We got to Gladstone and there were no available motels so, after much whinging, she joined us for the night. She was last to get to bed (i.e. the fold-down dining table) and as soon as she hopped into the bed the caravan collapsed. Dad forgot to tighten the jockey wheel. She packed her bags, went to the bus station and made her own way home!

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Call of the wild

Caravanning, hubby got up early for a morning fish, while me, son eight and daughter four were sleeping in the back of van. Hubby had toast and coffee with the door open as a large grey kangaroo was watching him. From the door he teased the kangaroo with toast. The next minute, it jumped into the van, and the boxing started to get him out! The children and I were screaming, and there was no room for the kangaroo to turn around – its tail was half the length of the van! I jumped up and with a water pistol started shooting at the kangaroo, and with a push from hubby he was finally out.

Read: 10 best animal jokes

Crime and punishment

The family and I were in New Zealand, spending eight days camping at various caravan parks. One night we could hear raised voices coming from a campervan beside us. The van owner had caught two thieves trying to pinch fuel from his van. The thieves had put their hose in the wrong tank so all they got was a mouthful of raw sewage. The owner didn’t press charges as thieves were punished enough!

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Written by Brad Lockyer

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