The pros and cons of sleeping apart

Seek out intimacy to stay sane if you sleep separately from your partner.

Are separate beds for you?

No one can blame the US First Lady, Melania Trump, for sleeping apart from her hubby, given his penchant for eating greasy cheese burgers in bed.

And let’s face it, many of us have secretly crept into another room when our partners snored too loudly, tossed and turned too violently or simply hogged the doona.

Increasingly, more couples are shrugging off any perceived stigma and confessing to sleeping in separate beds. After all, bunking down elsewhere from time to time doesn’t mean you have to throw out your sex life entirely.

And waking up on your own and refreshed from a night of uninterrupted sleep could make you a better day-time partner for your better half.

Many couples who report sleeping apart say that rather than ruining their relationships, it has strengthened them.

According to a 2015 National Sleep Foundation survey, 25 per cent of American couples report sleeping in separate beds and 10 per cent say they have separate bedrooms.

A Huffington Post survey revealed that rather than signalling a union was on the rocks, for 12 couples sleeping apart was perfectly normal. Read here to understanding their reasoning.

In fact, there may be evidence that sleeping alone is better for your long-term health. British sleep specialist Neil Stanley believes that if your slumber is regularly interrupted by a restless partner you are more likely to suffer from depression and heart disease.

But there is no denying that there are also emotional health benefits of sleeping close to another familiar human.

So if you do take the plunge and move into a different bed or bedroom, ensure you make the time to stay intimate and connected. Gazing into each other’s eyes or having skin on skin contact is known to lower cortisol levels, keeping you calm and reassured.

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    COMMENTS

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    Tib
    9th Mar 2018
    11:53am
    There wouldn't be enough room for trumps wife with his girlfriend there, unless it's a really big bed. All jokes aside most people sleep better on their own.
    Kathleen
    9th Mar 2018
    12:13pm
    I think his ego would need a king plus bed on its own!
    Charlie
    9th Mar 2018
    12:55pm
    Maybe his and hers double beds would be ok. Maybe for some, separate rooms would be ok.
    Maybe birth control for over populated countries.
    Anonymous
    9th Mar 2018
    1:14pm
    Well I'll open up a big can of worms here and admit that my wife and I sleep in separate bedrooms after just 6 months of marriage, Reason for doing so is so we get a good nights sleep. WE were both use to sleeping by ourselves for years before we married, I'm 66 shies 51,I snore and have a bad wheeze and toss and turn all night long, so we find we sleep better apart. BUT our relationship is starting to suffer,intimacy has dropped off and we are not as close now as we were.
    Tib
    9th Mar 2018
    1:41pm
    Stay single it's being married that caused the intimacy to drop off not the bedrooms.
    VeryCaringBigBear
    9th Mar 2018
    4:05pm
    Don't most couples now sleep each end of the house so they each get the single pension? Good idea I say too.
    Anonymous
    9th Mar 2018
    4:51pm
    I don't think I could be bothered with all the checking up from C/L. There would surly be reviews. I have had a look at the form people need to fill out. The questions are easy enough to answer, but its the proof that would be the hard part, You cant just say you are separated, you need to prove it. Again turning honest people into cheats and liar's.
    VeryCaringBigBear
    10th Mar 2018
    5:33pm
    It is very easy to say you are sperated so if you have issues with Centrelink's questions etc then it is your conscience that is letting you down. I certainly don't have a problem with it myself.
    Rosret
    9th Mar 2018
    6:22pm
    2 queen size beds in separate rooms with sound proofing - perfect! - I am sure it would save a lot of marriages.
    The Queen and Prince Philip sleep in separate quarters too
    Tib
    9th Mar 2018
    8:52pm
    Yes some women snore like a drunken mule. How they could possibly make a noise that horrendous is beyond me. All that wouldn't be so bad if they would just stop farting. The smell would make a goanna puke.
    Anonymous
    10th Mar 2018
    7:36am
    Thanks TIB, that put a smile on my face and gave me a belly laugh and its only 7.30 in the morning.
    Tib
    9th Mar 2018
    9:44pm
    From what ive seen of The Huffington Post I can't imagine any reasoning was involved. I don't think they're capable.
    johnp
    10th Mar 2018
    10:25am
    Disadvantage I can see (in our case anyway) is that the carpet between the 2 beds would get worn out in short time. ;-) ;-)
    patti
    10th Mar 2018
    4:25pm
    My partner and I slept in seperate rooms for most of our time together. His snoring was so loud that I could never get any sleep, and as a shift worker in a crisis service this was a problem. later, when I nursed him through terminal cancer, having him in another room meant I was able to get the sleep I needed in order to care for him effectively


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