15th Jun 2017
The top 10 biggest turn-ons and turn-offs for men and women
flirting couple

I’m no expert on the game of love, but I do know this: if you want to play the game you better know the rules.

Now, you may be diving back into the fray or you may have been in a relationship for years. Whatever your situation, knowing the biggest turn-ons and turn-offs for men and women will either help get your proverbial foot in the door, or make your relationship that much better.

These are in no set order and have been sourced from across the internet – so don’t shoot the messenger!

Turn-ons for women

1. Being generous

2. Being a good kisser

3. Having a good sense of humour and a nice smile

4. Being chivalrous and polite

5. Confidence

6. Doing housework

7. Playing with her hair and massage

8. Good grooming and fashion sense

9. Actively listening

10. Intelligence

Turn-offs for women

1. Poor taste in footwear

2. Being pompous and cocky

3. Being uncircumcised and not ‘manscaping’

4. Being dumb

5. Being selfish

6. Too aggressive during sex

7. Bad driving

8. Being a pushover

9. Being insecure or oversensitive

10. Being boring

Turn-ons for men

1. Smell of food cooking

2. Being handy with tools

3. Wearing matching lingerie

4. Doing yoga

5. Wearing red

6. Telling dirty jokes

7. Being a good driver

8. Making first contact

9. Being appreciated

10. Playing with his hair or stroking his head

10. Being affectionate

Turn-offs for men

1. Long fingernails

2. Nagging or talking too much

3. Poor hygiene

4. Eating with your mouth open

5. Flirting with other men

6. Being mean and bitchy

7. Wearing too much perfume

8. Discussing ex-boyfriends

9. Baby talk and calling him pet names in public

10. Being too ‘handsy’ in public

So, how do you rate on the turn-on/turn-off scale? Do you agree with these assessments? Or do you find other things more annoying/alluring?



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    23rd Jun 2017
    Those turns offs for men are turn offs for women too. PS Hate having my hair stoked, hate being woken up during a cat nap, hate swearing and rude mating rituals. Kissing when your old - ugh - mal order and .... nope - a hug will do.
    I could tell you the likes but its all a bit personal.
    One of the other turn offs is wanting me to like the same things as him. If that's all he wants he needs a mate not a girl friend.
    ... and for the fathers who have just become a parent. - time - its the most exhausting time in a mother's life and her hormones just aren't there for awhile.
    23rd Jun 2017
    It all seems to make some sense, except for the #1 Turn-ons for men : "Smell of food cooking". The next time I'm at a restaurant I'll be watching out for all the horny men. Is this the reason why teenage boys who still live at home spend so much time masturbating? Mum and Dad (or whoever cooks), should consider this effect on their sons!
    Now I too love the smell of food cooking, but it's mainly a platonic thing.
    23rd Jun 2017
    I find some of the turn on's for women a turn off.
    Being generous , I hate finding a woman's hand in my wallet ( turn off)
    Doing housework , (turn off)
    When a woman says she wants an intelligent man, she means a man that agrees with everything she says!
    I don't care if you find my foreskin offensive or you think I should shave my arse you are out of luck.
    So all you want is for me to clean your house pay for everything you want and agree with everything you say.
    I got bad news for you ladies you weren't worth that when you were 20 your definitely not worth that now.
    23rd Jun 2017
    I wouldn't worry yourself too much, Tib. I don't imagine there are throngs of women beating down your door, inquiring about the state of your foreskin or manscaping.
    And if you're not into keeping house, it's probably over ridden by vermin. Now that's a turn off.
    23rd Jun 2017
    Actually as we grow older there are fewer men as we tend to die young and there are many women out there that got the house and car in the divorce but not the super. So there are heaps of women out there looking for someone to pay for their retirement , or they will have to work until 70. So there are actually heaps of women available. So older women's bargaining power is very low. There is no shortage of female company but thanks for asking. Ha ha.
    23rd Jun 2017
    I think you'll find there are as many older women as there are men, who want nothing to do with the opposite sex after nasty marriage break ups.
    What upsets me most are the people who neglect their children after the marriage breaks down, just to punish their Ex. I fear these people will never grow up and are terrible roll models for their kids.
    23rd Jun 2017
    Among other things, males die younger than females (on average only) because:
    1) they die fighting (in wars and pubs),
    2) they participate in more risk-taking behaviour and
    3) they have poorer judgement.

    103 males are born to every 100 females born. But by the time they are your age, the chances of living a longer life have evened out, because you've already survived the war/risk cull period for males.

    If you look after your health and keep the house clean it will improve your chances of survival, whatever your gender or state of arousal.
    23rd Jun 2017
    I agree Janran I particularly dislike woman who run down their exhusband to their children so the children will no longer have anything to do with them. Or those women who send their children to their exhusband at 16 when they no longer get money for them. It seems many women only use children as a bargaining chip in divorce so they can get more money but they really don't care about them.
    Some woman refuse access just to punish their exhusband and that's only the tip of the iceberg.
    23rd Jun 2017
    look forward to more female soldiers in the front line to even the numbers. Isn't feminism
    grand. Ha ha
    23rd Jun 2017
    As I said, it's disgusting how some parents behave after a split up. They don't deserve to be parents at all when they put their own needs before their children's. But Tib, of course both men and women are to blame, as it's rarely 100% one partner's fault. Some men are atrocious and so are some women.

    I'm sure it's very difficult when you perceive yourself as the one hard done by. If that's the case, just try to be the better person - don't stoop to her level. Show your kids how good you are, by example. Write your kids a letter and tell them you love them no matter what, and that you WILL be there for them if they need you.

    I hope you can find a way to let your anger and resentment go. You'll be happier and healthier if you can.
    23rd Jun 2017
    It's sobering to realise that the biggest killer of men these days is suicide , 6 men die every day , many of these deaths are because of divorce. Over 70% of divorces are instigated by women. You are right though many men also die in war, it's a requirement of citizenship of a country that they defend that country a sacrifice that women do not pay. I remember very well the conscription of the 60 's where no men had a choice, not women but men. It's not bitterness that drives me but some sense of fair treatment. Something that very few women would understand.
    23rd Jun 2017
    OMG Tib, seriously? EVERYONE pays the price when their son, their brother, their uncle, their husband or their father dies at war. It's just as tragic if your daughter, your sister, your auntie, your wife or your mother dies, at war or giving birth or ANY way they die.

    Stop dividing us - we are all people who bleed, who cry, who work, who hurt. We need to help each other and it needs to be a 2-way street.

    Maybe the problem is that males have had more power for so long, they have become accustomed to being entitled to the lion's share. Now they are being asked to step up, but some of their fathers never gave them an example of fairness in marriage, and this is very difficult for men to digest and change their perspective.

    These days, most younger married people have to do paid work if they want to own a home, or even to just pay the rent. If they have children, you can understand why the wife expects the husband to share the housework. Lots of men can't cop this and this is one of the reasons why women choose divorce.

    The upside of feminism is that now women have real options. When I was growing up there were only 3 options: to become someone's wife, a nun or a spinster.
    The downside of feminism is that many women find themselves doing everything and they're totally exhausted. They need to teach their husbands and children how to pull their weight.
    23rd Jun 2017
    Typical you turn a comment about men's sacrifice during war time which you treat with contempt into an argument about housework and washing up as if they are the same. Ridiculous .... Followed by a typical femtard rant .
    A man gets his brains blow out and the feminist says ohh it's really women that suffer. Ridiculous .
    Your comments remind me women...children same thing.
    23rd Jun 2017
    I don't think men having to go to war is a requirement of citizenship. It would be against the anti-discrimination laws for a start. But in the past, where Conscription was imposed, it may have been the case. I have friends who were called up and went to gaol as conscientious objectors, rather than kill foreign soldiers who were often men, just like themselves.

    Thank heavens the world has changed since those dark days.

    Life is a struggle. It doesn't promise fairness. Hopefully, we choose partners who promise to be fair to each other. How would we know the good times if we never had tough times? These days, when I'm really struggling, I remind myself that good stuff happens right after the bad stuff. As a matter of fact, the bad stuff creates the good stuff, because the crisis time forces me to learn and change. And then it's a new day.

    Every day I count my blessings. That includes my gorgeous husband who cooks and cleans, as I do. We both have our faults and short-comings, but we refuse to punish each other for them. I like to think we become better people because of that. We don't waste precious time and energy mulling over the past. But we still struggle - it's only human.
    23rd Jun 2017
    Well Tib, YOUR comment totally ignored the fact that women give birth, something men are incapable of doing, even if they wanted to. The other thing you've ignored is the suffering of whole families, both male and female members, who lose their male and female relatives in war. It's the ones who are left that suffer, and it's the absolute pits for the soldiers who survive, scarred forever by the disgusting trauma of war.

    And then there is the worst aspect of war; the innocent civilians caught up in a warlord's game - those who are maimed, raped, pregnant to their enemy, tortured, separated from loved ones and left grieving for their dead. I don't think dying is the worst thing that can happen in wartime.

    We are all people, Tib.
    24th Jun 2017
    Janran and Tib
    Are we witnessing the beginnings of a blossoming relationship here?
    28th Jul 2017
    Lol I had a laugh out of that! Thanks :)
    25th Jun 2017
    Was interested to read that males being uncircumcised was a turn off for women, given circumcision of infant males has been on the wan since the 1970s, and that in Oz today circumcision has declined to something like 20% according to some statistics I've seen....

    Also thought the whole 'manscaping' thing where men are hairless all over is just fashion a passing fad if you will ...with men wanting to be as hairy as all get out in the not too distant past - particularly in relation to chest hair department...

    Darned if I know ....big noting, self-aggrandising whinging bullying men who think they know everything are first rate pains in the a.se, thus are mega turn-offs on all levels for most women ...just sayin'
    ex PS
    26th Jun 2017
    Hmmm, isn't there a worldwide outcry that a huge part of the male population in the Muslim world require their women to be circumcised? And here we are in the modern Western World, and what do we have, women advocating the unnecessary mutilation of mens genitals. How many children are going to suffer because of this?
    What a regressive, overbearing gender these women have become. Pushing mutilation because they say it looks better, because there is no other valid reason for wholesale circumcision.
    Then again if you look at the "Perfect Women" of today, most of them are 20% filler and plastic, they really are emulating Barbie. Do women really think that men want them to all have huge breasts, lips that look like they have been stung by bees and faces that are not capable of showing expressions or are they just competing against other women's views of what is attractive.
    26th Jun 2017
    Wake up, PS. Nearly everyone is against genital mutilation these days, whatever the gender of the child. I will add this - at least circumcised males can still have an orgasm, unlike those who have suffered female circumcision. A lot of girls die as a result of this heinous practice.

    So don't go calling all females "a regressive, overbearing gender" when we are on the same page on this very issue. Except for some religions, I don't know of anyone or group who is advocating for male circumcision these days. You're not helping anyone by dividing us on gender lines. I have a group of very close female friends and we talk about everything to do with sex. Not once have any of these ladies expressed an opinion or preference for or against penis mutilation.

    It's insulting to both genders, some of the turn on and turn offs. Just from some of the responses, it is apparent that the age of the respondents are not from our age group. I totally agree with everything else you've said. Religion, fashion and peer group pressure have a lot to answer for when it comes to oppression of people.
    ex PS
    26th Jun 2017
    Read it again Janran, I did not indicate that all females had the same view on circumcision. The point I was trying to make is that it is not right for any gender or group to try to try and influence how others feel about their bodies.
    I think you are in need of a wake up call if you really think that nearly everyone is against genital mutilation, it is still a huge problem in predominantly Muslim countries, it is not a case of these people being evil, it is because of cultural and religious beliefs.
    I have talked about this subject with my friends and was amazed at the proportion of women who wanted their sons to be circumcised simply because they wanted them to look like their fathers. Maybe your friends are exceptional, or maybe they are not as close and open as you think they are.
    26th Jun 2017
    None of my friends have allowed their boys to be circumcised, despite pressure from the boys' fathers.

    If I had to choose, I'd prefer sex with an uncircumcised penis. But my biggest preference is for the quality of the man, not the penis.

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