Online dating: how it can go wrong

Online dating can be fun, but beware of the scams.

Hand holding smartphone with caution tape and the words danger online dating on screen

Online dating may be one of the more popular and common ways to meet people these days, but as this story from Ken attests, you do need to be careful and have your wits about you, to avoid dating scams.

Ken – I think a warning to older citizens seeking a partner may be the order of the day. I went onto olderdating.com and met, whom I thought were two lovely ladies. I spoke to one on Skype over three days, before receiving the first request for money to be sent via a ‘load and go’ card.

When I refused, I was accused of not trusting her. Then one day later I was asked for more money, and a lot larger sum, which I again refused. I was verbally abused on Skype quite badly and when I tried to make further contact, all my attempts were ignored.

Undeterred, I thought I would contact the second lady and had one conversation with her, before she disappeared as well.

The two ladies had similar phone numbers and I have since realised that they are one and the same, using two different names, two different cities, two different Skype accounts and two different phones.

To me, it sounds like an extravagant attempt to relieve some of us genuine people, looking for love, of our hard earned money.

Perhaps a warning for users of this service might help. I know that now, I will never trust such dating sites again.

Does Ken’s story strike a chord? Have you been stung on a dating site? Or has your experience been much more successful?

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    COMMENTS

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    Peterrj
    23rd Dec 2015
    10:34am
    Anyone watched the movie her? Yes the name is simply 'her'.

    It's a great movie and it is one step further along the line from online dating!!!!

    When your online dating days are over then take up 'her'.

    There are also male 'her' versions as well!!!
    CindyLou
    23rd Dec 2015
    11:13am
    I'm really sorry that this happened to Ken.

    My position is that NOBODY should ever ask another person for money, it should be a huge warning sign in any relationship or situation.
    Pamiea
    23rd Dec 2015
    12:23pm
    Yes Ken one has to be very careful. I had a very sophisticated sting attempted on myself with many messages backwards and forward and then eventually the request for money. Fortunately I had worked in a legal environment for many years and recognised the scam after a while and played the person which made him very angry. I reported him to RSVP. I have found disappointingly that the men I meet online expect an invitation into my home (and then my bed) all for the cost of a $4 coffee!! Not on!
    KSS
    23rd Dec 2015
    1:44pm
    Absolutely Pamiea. You should at least get a cake as well! hahaha
    Gino
    23rd Dec 2015
    1:20pm
    I have an explicit photo and they took on my nieces photo on face book and I have deleted it all perminately. So watch out for scammers!
    Pamiea
    23rd Dec 2015
    1:57pm
    Good one KSS! That cracked me up but it still wouldt work on my first date ????
    Peterrj
    23rd Dec 2015
    2:11pm
    Pamela, I was a trifle disappointed at your response to KSS's overtly generous offer. So I have applied a cost effective analysis to the issue and come up with a counter offer for KSS. What about coffee on the first date and a cake on the second date???

    Would that work for you. That way both could be happy???

    I always wanted to be a match maker!!!!
    Rose
    23rd Dec 2015
    3:08pm
    I think that is so sad that people exist who try to take advantage of others . They are low life.
    My little problem is an other: any time I go to the close by shopping centre I encounter in the aisles some loitering person who seems to think I am there for reasons other than shopping. I was made aware of this when the young person at the counter wished me luck.When I asked what for,he answered : for your dating!!! . I was very surprised and worried : what did I do to warrant such a conviction ? It seems that is a matter of time-table.I am shopping in the evening! I try to avoid the heat of some scorching mornings after a melanoma operation made me aware of the fact that my skin is not sun friendly. Funny how people jump to conclusions!
    KSS
    23rd Dec 2015
    5:14pm
    I've heard of this Rose. As long as there are no bananas in your basket, you'll be fine. I have heard that on certain days, having bananas in your basket is a message you are 'looking'. Problem is I can't remember which way up they are meant to be! haha
    Pamiea
    23rd Dec 2015
    3:18pm
    No doubt some of you who respond are obviously married or in a relationship or too old to get out there. Well sometimes I wonder why I bother with seeking a bloke cos they have gone down in my estimation big time. Most of the good ones have been snapped up and when I consider it living on my own is a dream. Dont have to consider anyone, eat what I like when I want, watch whatever I like on tv and float my own financial boat successfully plus there are lots of other benefits BUT it would be nice to have someone buy meva coffee one week and a cake the next and I would reciprocate haaa!
    Sally
    23rd Dec 2015
    7:51pm
    I have had some interesting online dates, some good, some not so good. As well as having "the hard word" put on me after a cup of coffee, I have had males invite themselves to my place, men who post very old photos online, as well as men who are after a free ride. I am very wary, but do enjoy meeting people, even though they are not always who they claim to be.
    Sue L
    25th Dec 2015
    11:51am
    Found the love of my life through RSVP. Like others here had many not so nice experiences where the guy was just looking for sex, some were quite not all there. I always made it that they had to meet for coffee and a chat (no Skype) in a public place so I could measure them up and they me. I met quite a few who didn't want to meet again after the first meeting. It worked for me.
    Rob
    26th Dec 2015
    9:57am
    Great attitude Sue L. My son and his wife met through on line dating as well as other people we know.

    I think it is a great facility for people to get together. Like everything in life there are the dropkicks that ruin it for everyone else.
    karen
    26th Dec 2015
    3:24pm
    It's not just online dating - You could get the same response and treatment after meeting someone at your local AA meeting, church group, tennis or golf club, shopping centre, senior citizens club, etc. people like this are out there everywhere, in all forms and sizes. These days one always needs to be vigilant and not to let their heart overrule their head. Needless to say, don't give up as lm sure there are genuine people out there looking for a companion or just a friend to talk to.
    Pamiea
    26th Dec 2015
    3:54pm
    You are so right Karen. I can recall hearing of a policeman who portrayed that he was helping vulnerable people and all he was doing was getting some addresses and going around and taking advantage of them sexually! Great eh (NOT). I realise I am too smart and street wise to be taken advantage of. I have decided to let nature takes it course. If its meant to be that I meet a decent mate it will happen and if its not it won't but do I look worried NO :)


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