Elder abuse statistics worrying

Abuse of the elderly and frail not improving

Elder abuse statistics worrying

An awareness campaign and helpline to combat elder abuse were launched in August last year. The project had more than $100,000 in state funding. While the project has proved effective, the statistics are still worrying.

The Tasmanian Minister for Human Services, Cassy O’Connor, has told a budget estimates hearing that 120 cases of elder abuse were reported on the abuse helpline between August 2012 and March 2013. Seventy per cent of the victims were women, over half the reported cases involved financial abuse and almost 70 per cent cited psychological or emotional abuse. Approximately 40 per cent of cases were in relation to a person over 80 years of age.

Elder abuse is defined by the World Health Organisation as “a single, or repeated act, or lack of appropriate action, occurring within any relationship where there is an expectation of trust which causes harm or distress to an older person”.

To find out more visit the ABC News website.

Opinion: It’s all pervasive and it’s not improving

Saturday15 June will be the seventh World Elder Abuse Awareness Day (WEAAD), initiated by the International Network for the Prevention of Elder Abuse Inc. (INPEA). INPEA was founded by Dr Elizabeth Podnieks in Massachusetts, USA, in 1997.

Most Australians would be unaware of any of this and many might even ask, ‘so what? What’s all this got to do with me or my family?’. After all, the contemporary calendar is crammed to overflowing with worthy organisations all pursuing their lofty agendas. Every day and every week of the year seems to be dedicated to a worthy cause.

Sadly, at the personal level, we’re all getting older and even if we’re currently in denial about the direct relevance of WEAAD, perhaps it becomes a great deal more relevant when we consider our own parents or elderly relatives and friends.

In my research for this blog, I recalled my own maternal aunt, my mum’s only sibling, who had always been very active and fiercely independent. She worked full-time in Macquarie Street, Sydney, in a demanding medical role until compulsory retirement. She subsequently sold her cherished little Fiat Bambina and her home unit and moved into the local church-owned retirement village in the leafy Eastern Suburbs. Over the ensuing years she remained active and independent with a wide circle of friends, regularly playing golf and bridge. As her health began to decline, some of her closest friends became increasingly concerned and contacted me, her ‘nearest’ relative, somewhat ironic since I was living in Melbourne. From this distance, I attempted, over many months, with increasing frustration, to have my aunt relocated within the same facility to assisted living. It was clear that her dementia was rapidly getting worse and she could no longer care for herself.

Unfortunately, the phone call to inform us that my aunt had passed away preceded the retirement village responding to my requests and her obvious needs.

As I read the sketchy statistics and ‘facts’ on what is known of elder abuse in Australia, my memories went back twenty years to my aunt’s depressing and totally avoidable last months. Even as a long term resident of a long established and highly reputable facility which claimed to provide all its residents with the very best of care, at a premium price, she still suffered.

What do you want for your elderly relatives and friends when they can no longer fend for themselves? And whose responsibility is it to tackle elder abuse? 





    COMMENTS

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    ozirules
    13th Jun 2013
    12:24pm
    I am currently having a problem with a local aged care facility over the simple provision of a boiled, fried or poached egg for my mum. Impossible say the NH. No where can I find that eggs other than the overcooked scrambled variety are banned. At 96, the denying of the simple pleasure of a soft yolk egg to every aged care resident in a facility could be construed as abuse in my book. It flys in the face of the Charter of Residents Rights which form part of the Aged Care Act of 1997. Also it goes against the NSW Guidelines for food service to vulnerable persons. The duty of care mums nursing home is not being balanced with the dignity of risk which should be afforded to her as her right.
    jillypilly
    13th Jun 2013
    2:56pm
    Each state and territory has an Aged Care Advocacy organisation, independent of government, and we are funded to advocate on behalf of residents' rights. Here in NSW the organisation is TARS Inc and we welcome calls from anyone concerned about the care an older person is receiving in an aged care home. We can be contacted on 02 9281 3600 or 18000 424 079.
    student
    19th Jun 2013
    2:39pm
    I understand your frustration ozi. I used to take a loaf of 'sultana' bread to the kitchen of my mothers nursing home. Out of 1 loaf, Mother received ONE slice of burned and rock hard toast :) Nowadays the food is bought in from an outside supplier (no longer are the meals freshly made onsite and served every day) so this may explain why your dear Mum can't get a real egg yolk! I did however, take action when her 02 machine was not connected properly and when one particular 'nurse' (NO nursing qualifications) would make her wait and wait for a bed pan especially at night. I had dreadful trouble trying to convince the Director of nursing at the Home my Mother was being neglected and abused! The Home concerned is rated as one of the best in my area!! I can not remember the name of the Dept I contacted but they were most helpful. Mother died peacefully thank goodness.
    Young Simmo
    13th Jun 2013
    1:08pm
    I suffer Aged Abuse on a daily basis, but only survive because I am obedient. When my wife starts washing up I reach for the tea towel, she says, leave it and go back to your computer. Reluctantly I say yes dear and do as I am told, it's a hard life.
    Young Simmo
    13th Jun 2013
    1:27pm
    Before somebody jumps in and tells me I am making light of a serious subject, I would like to say hang on, put yourself in my shoes, I am doing it tough.
    Nan Norma
    13th Jun 2013
    3:21pm
    You don't know what tough is. And yes, it is tough. I have been a victim myself.
    Jack
    13th Jun 2013
    7:39pm
    You is a brave man Simmo. In the same situation, I keep wiping the dishes. I is not slow (much); I know on which side my bread is buttered!! ;-P
    Young Simmo
    13th Jun 2013
    9:36pm
    Yeh Jack, by the time the dishes come up I have already eaten my bread, so I win both ways.
    Pass the Ductape
    14th Jun 2013
    6:22am
    Great comment Young Simmo - just what the world needs - a lot more humour! It would appear that some of us have forgotten how to appreciate it..
    student
    19th Jun 2013
    2:44pm
    OK ... when I start my own Home for the Hopelessly Wayward, You guys can all come to stay ... as long as you behave yourselves (not!!) No washing up, no wiling up, no cooking, no ironing ... ahhhhhhhhhh, just imagine life with me :) :)
    gerberry1
    13th Jun 2013
    1:17pm
    The figures given are only those that have been found out. Many of the elderly do not complain because of repercussions from family or who ever is doing the abuse.
    Whose responsibility you ask, if it is your relative then it is your responsibility to make the time to find out what is going on. Phone calls are useless, especially from miles away. If you are the person who is responsible for the relative then it is up to you to get off your butt and if in another state, get on a plane or drive up and see for yourself.
    Staff at a facility are not going to jeopardise their position. If you cannot go and see for yourself then I'm sure that you know someone (old friends of your own or elder) and get them to check on the person.
    Where to report aged care abuse, well go to the Internet, type in Aged Care reporting abuse and see what comes up, a lot of web sites but no quickly identifiable phone numbers etc. Plenty of stuff for children but the Elderly, forget it.
    The only way to keep an eye on the elderly whether it is at home, nursing home or aged care facility is to go and look yourself or get someone who you can trust to go and look.
    Now going to look, this is an Art in itself, whoever is looking must go at different times of the day and different days. Be observant. Just don't look at the facility, look at the person. Are there bruises on them anywhere. Listen to what they have to say, ask indirect questions so that they don't realise that they could be 'dobbing' the place in.
    The one thing the elderly hate is the threat from others that they could lose their 'bed'. This has been known to happen in the past but what must be realised is that one must be ever vigilant, because the abuse and abuser can be very sneaky.
    jillypilly
    13th Jun 2013
    2:57pm
    Hi Gerberry1, please see above my response to ozirules' comments.
    Tom Tank
    13th Jun 2013
    1:35pm
    The only serious comments so far have related to aged care facilities. There is no doubt that can happen there but it is probable that there is more abuse of the elderly within a family situation. I suspect that statistics are available that would support this.
    Aged Care Facilities are subject to strict controls and should anyone have a legitimate grounds for suspecting any wrongdoing there is an avenue whereby complaints can be made.
    A major issue is the funding provided is, as usual not overly generous and many facilities are run be private operators for profit. The facilities are checked but the owners are not and do not have to answer for where the funding is spent.
    Nan Norma
    13th Jun 2013
    3:25pm
    Tom Tank you are so right. There is more abuse going onin the house where no one sees it than in the homes
    Pass the Ductape
    15th Jun 2013
    7:15am
    I would suggest that much of the funding goes straight into the back pocket of the NH proprietors!
    student
    19th Jun 2013
    2:53pm
    hey Ducktape, what about the share holders?? They get more than the proprietor,

    I do Meals on Wheels and one of our responsibilities is to notify the office if we (the deliverers) feel the client is in any sort of danger or needs assistance with something. I have a few clients whose child/children work and the elderly person is alone all day. Old dears love to chat and will tell the most embarrassing things!! Just like Show and Tell at school. I know not all people can be monitored but this is one unseen watching of the elderly.
    Tezza
    13th Jun 2013
    1:36pm
    Ozirules, simple solution to your Mum receiving an egg other than scrambled is to have a family member prepare the egg and perhaps some fingers of soft toast themselves when she receives visits. My Mother and mother-in-law are in NHs and have been in and out over the years from respite to now, full-time care. All NHs have a kitchenette with a microwave oven and a toaster. NHs cannot cater for every single resident's meal requests. My concern regarding NHs is the lack of experience and predominance of staff with English as their second language. This is no reflection on the staff who work in the system and do their best but on the companies which own the NHs and the wages paid.These companies' first priority is to their share holders. The meals served to the residents have been developed around a cost per meal. Within 25 years when I am in a NH, I believe that the meals will be higher quality, frozen prepared meals that will be re heated by 'kitchen staff'. These meals will more than likely be imported as the Australian agricultural and processing industries will be non existent.
    Tezza
    ozirules
    13th Jun 2013
    2:05pm
    You have a couple of valid points Tezza. I know NH's cannot cater for individual tastes but when most of the residents want something then surely a bit of flexibility in the set menu would be achievable. It would be convenient if family members kept away from NH's then they could just keep residents too drugged up to complain and fed on a drip to save on kitchen staff. Fanciful maybe but for who's convenience and well being are aged care facilities supposed to be funded.
    Paddles
    13th Jun 2013
    3:19pm
    Tezza

    Bless you! You are a voice of reason in the babble.
    aussiebill
    13th Jun 2013
    1:39pm
    The problem with the increase of elder abuse stems from the current attitude in society of it is every person for themselves. We are and have been losing the empathy for others , and in particular for the elderly. Too many younger people are only interested in what is in it for them, and when I say that I am also referring to adult children whose only concern is how much is in the inheritance for them and how soon can I get it.

    Having experienced that attitude first hand I am well aware I am not alone in that situation.

    What younger one's seem to forget is they would not be here if it was not for their elders and a little bit of empathy and respect all round would not astray. In fact it would make for a much more pleasant time all round.

    In that regard I fathered to children neither of whom contact me anymore after their mother and I separated over 20 years ago. In the lead up to the no contact now what every thing that has gone wrong is all my current wife and my fault.
    Innyoo
    13th Jun 2013
    2:24pm
    I think there is a lot of scams that target the elderly at home, to get money and financial details etc. My husband and I live with my parents (in their 90's) so that they can stay at home.We are all loving it, and our children and grandchildren love to visit. There is lot to be said for some of the 'old ways'. Our children all say they want to look after us when its our turn to be really old. Even so, we have to be aware of what others may do when my parents are out, though so far all they find is a lot of lovely people who are happy to help them. I think the comment on the 'me first' mentality is very true, that is a big factor in the treatment of any group of people. Sadly that is what the last couple of generations have been taught - 'I am the most important person, and must look after myself first."
    Angel
    13th Jun 2013
    2:34pm
    I just wanted to warm everyone with elderly relatives or friends, abuse takes many forms, my elderly Uncle who owned a beautiful home in one of the expensive northern suburbs of Sydney was very frail and in his 90's the parish priest with another priest (catholic) visited him and got him to sign all his estate over to the Saint Vincent de Paul society, we tried to fight this injustice but they (the church) had a top firm of solicitors and they took it all, so be warned make sure you visit and check that they have made a will! By the way this cannot happen in Europe the law there is more just, if the person has any living relatives the proceeds cannot be given to a charity. PLEASE BE WARNED I even asked the St Vincent de Paul guy if they found photos or any personal items could I have those, they all went in the skip! except for her jewellery.
    Anonymous
    16th Jun 2013
    11:28am
    bloody hell,greed is just greed,but i wouldent put it past the biggest business in the world (Catholic Church) to scam an old man out of his money on the promise of "absolution of sins"
    what a joke,the Priests are the sinners not the punters they are supposed to save.
    Sorry that happened to you Angel,but you got between the Church and their Bank,you cant do that mate,the Catholic Church especially,wants your money and assets when you die,not your soul,its about money.
    And pity the lousey dogs who kept these personal possessions from you,dogs!

    billy
    Young Simmo
    16th Jun 2013
    11:35am
    Hey Billyknows, what price the Judge or Magistrate in that case was a catholic? ??????$$$$$$$
    Tezza
    13th Jun 2013
    2:53pm
    Congratulations Innyoo. My wife and I did the same in the past. Whilst the elderly have their health and can manage their toiletting (with some help), home is a great option. The elderly say ' I want to die with dignity in my own home.' Sounds great so long as dementia or a fall does not render them bed ridden. There becomes a time when bed linen and carpets can only be cleaned so many times in a day. Pressures on younger families these days are greater than in the past. My wife and I will make sure that we are well established in a retirement village style complex that will have tri care facilities, long before the time comes that other will have to make the decision for us. Children, grand children and great grand children can visit/take us out whenever the desire suits them.
    There will become an increasing number of these complexes as the large multi national, health care companies seek to tap into the 'baby boomers' retirement/super.funds. May your folk remain in good health and in time be taken together with a massive heart attack. This would be their wish.
    Tezza
    13th Jun 2013
    2:57pm
    Angel, maybe you should have visited your dear old uncle more regularly.
    Pass the Ductape
    14th Jun 2013
    6:38am
    Whoa! A bit rough on the Angel, Tezza.
    Nan Norma
    15th Jun 2013
    9:48am
    Yes Tezza, Ductape is right, you don't know all the circumstanes. I stopped visiting my mother because of the verbal abuse I got from my sister which started making me ill. She happily then went around telling everyone I didn't care about my mother. I'm sure those that didn't know must have thought I was a terrible uncaring daughter.
    jillypilly
    13th Jun 2013
    3:10pm
    For everyone reading this page, please go to Debbie's page on what constitutes elder abuse and where to seek help. The role of each of these organisations is to assist people who believe they or an elderly relative, friend or neighbour is experiencing abuse whether it be neglect, emotional abuse, financial abuse, physical abuse, sexual abuse or psychological abuse. Each of these organisations have advocates, solicitors, and/or advisers to assist. Because we are community organisations, our services are FREE and completely CONFIDENTIAL.
    Paddles
    13th Jun 2013
    3:16pm
    “a single, or repeated act, or lack of appropriate action, occurring within any relationship where there is an expectation of trust which causes harm or distress to an older person”.

    Accepting the above definition literally, do you think that we could all mount a class action against the Gillard/Green/Independent Government?
    HOLA
    14th Jun 2013
    8:46am
    Don't like your chances.
    Angel
    13th Jun 2013
    3:22pm
    I think anyone reading my post (Tezza) should have guessed that I did not live anywhere near my uncle, he lived in NSW and I live in the NT and do not have enough money to visit, although I did write often but did not know he did not have a will, so please do not judge without any knowledge of my circumstances..
    Nan Norma
    13th Jun 2013
    4:46pm
    reply
    I think anyone reading my post (Tezza) should have guessed that I did not live anywhere near my uncle, he lived in NSW and I live in the NT and do not have enough money to visit, although I did write often but did not know he did not have a will, so please do not judge without any knowledge of my circumstances..





    I'm so glad the subject of elder abuse has been highlighted on this website today. I've been shouting about it for years but no-one ever seemed very interested.
    Eight years ago I applied to the Tribunal Board to have my mother's finances administered by the Public Trustee. My mother, recently widowed, who had early on set dementia, had previously signed her name to go in a nursing home but my youngest sister 'grannynapped' her. I knew she would exploit my mother.Over the course of those years my sister claimed for up to $23.000 a year for her keep yet my mother received very little benefitand the Public Trustee took $7000 in annually in fees from her pension. Had the place where she lived been a nursing home it would have been shut down. I was abused every time I went to visit my mother till in the end it was affecting my health and I had to stop. I complained to the Public Trustee and to the Adult Guardian. Nobody was allowed to speak to my mother without my sister being present. I spoke to everybody I could think of. They were all sympathetic but could do nothing. The system is useless. My mother had a fully furnished house , but by the time she passed away there was nothing left. So I have nothing but her memories. I am sad, and angry, that I was not able to share those last few years with my mother as I loved her very much. The whole problem stemmed from the fact my mother was left with quite a sum of money. I believe the Public Trustee and the Office of the Adult Guardian have a lot to answer too. We think it can never happed to us, well it can as I became a victim myself
    alfie
    13th Jun 2013
    5:44pm
    As you get older you lose your voice and we, of today, must be their voices becaue one day we will be in their shoes. If we want to be treated fairly when we get into their shoes iin the future we have to fight for better conditions for them now. We have to pave the way for ourselves and demand better conditions.
    Nan Norma
    13th Jun 2013
    5:48pm
    Good luck, I curtainly tried. The people that can do something have put it into the too hard basket. But your right, that's why I writing on here now.
    ozirules
    13th Jun 2013
    5:50pm
    well said
    Pass the Ductape
    14th Jun 2013
    7:01am
    "As you get older you lose your voice." Quite correct alfie - and it can happen in any number of ways. Has anyone else found that the younger generation have difficulty dealing with you in situations requiring a little more thought or patience?
    marg5au
    13th Jun 2013
    6:59pm
    I read about elderly abuse by family or those people who have job of caring for the Elderly. but what about the people living next door to those who are staying in their own homes. We live next to the neighbors from hell, my 86 yr old husband is on an oxygen concentrator and I care for him at home, we do get some in house support, but my neighbors have caused me a nervous break down in the past, I tried to get an AVO on him, but it was sent to court and that is when I really did break down, we were ordered mediation but he broke that contract within 3 weeks of signing it, I could never go through all this again, it has taken a toll on both of us. At present thing's are quite but for how long who knows, does abuse to the elderly include abuse from outsiders.
    Nan Norma
    13th Jun 2013
    7:14pm
    marg5au Like you, I was requested to go for mediation with my sister. Worse thing I even did in my life. She was insulting and lied the whole time. Even the mediators raised their eyebrows a few times. She too signed an agreement but broke it the first week. It was a complete waste of time and my health suffered because of it. Never again.
    Paddles
    13th Jun 2013
    10:05pm
    Happily, I have never been in such a situation and am unlikely to ever be, but your reference to mediation suggests to me that there is some form of authority involved in such moves and if it results in a "contract" then common law should require compliance with the terms of that contract with non-compliance attracting some penalty.
    I would suggest that you go back to whatever tribunal dealt with the original dispute and complain that the other party is not playing their part.
    Nan Norma
    14th Jun 2013
    8:43am
    Paddles, If you read my previous writing you'd know that happened some time ago and my mother, (the reason the mediation) has since passed away. You can't legistrate some things. even at the second Tribunal my sister ignored all instrustions. that's why I say its all put in the two hard basket.
    kushka
    13th Jun 2013
    9:51pm
    after losing my husband of 52years and having had to move into an ach unit ,because my son made me feel like a burden for the very few tasks I asked him to do for me ,I really do not want to live with the empty days and night's any more ,I long for oblivion having thought it all through there really is nothing in this world that interests me any more ,being a realist and not one who can not just sit and watch TV till I pass on drives me nuts ,nor can I just sit making idle chit chat ,having a pretty heavy sort of childhood I never felt more safe in my life before as I did when my treasure and I married ,now without him I am afraid again lonely and having tried to move on after three years it is clear to me this is not going to happen he was my life and I was his ,do other's feel the same as I ,and just want it all to end ASAP kUSHKA
    Paddles
    13th Jun 2013
    10:14pm
    kushka

    I too lost a treasured partner after many years of happy marriage, the raising of a family and all that goes with it. Initially (and for some time) I felt the way you describe but I took a conscious decision to get on with life and fulfil my duties to my children and grandchildren.
    We all have to find our own way but there is a heap of help out there if you can become motivated to seek it out. As a start, you could contact Lifeline or Beyond Blue and, although they may not be appropriate for your mindset, I am sure they can point you in the right direction for assistance in getting through this.
    Young Simmo
    13th Jun 2013
    10:27pm
    kushka, that is an interesting comment for us. My wife and I met at 14 got married at 20 and now are in our 53rd year and still in love as much as when we were 14. We have discussed this exact subject and both agree, that if one of us checks out early the other one will continue to enjoy what ever we have left. We had 3 sons and lost the youngest in a drowning accident at 4 1/2 years so we probably have a slightly better appreciation of life than a lot of other people. We only get one bite of the cherry, so let's enjoy that cherry as much as possible.
    catsahoy
    14th Jun 2013
    7:42pm
    kushka, i really felt for you after reading your post, it must be terrible to feel so alone, i have 3 children, my eldest girl is 52 and recently divorced, and has always said if either my husband or i died and the other wanted, she would have a granny flat built onto her home and care for us, whether this would happen, who knows, im sure she meant it at the time, but caring for someone elderly is hard, my younger daughter i expect nothing from, as she is one of the ME ME people, my son is married with 2 young sons, but i know he would do whatever he could, i dont know where you live, but most places have councils who can give help with coming to do housework, ironing, and such chores,this at least would give you contact with the outside world, try RINGING THE GREY ARMY, if there is one in your locality, they have people who will come and visit, read to you if you wish, or just ring your local council or healthcare service, there is a range of things they will offer, they will come to your home and discuss your interests and work out how to best help you, if you are afraid of going out ,have you thought of a penpal, ? this is a great way of being in contact without having to leave your home, if this appeals to you, i would be only to happy to make contact, i am 73, so your vintage, contact DREW of this columb and he can give you my details, i have many and varied interests, im sure we could find something in common, you have to remember, the first move has to come from YOU, PLEASE dont give up on life, there is always something better around the corner, my best wishes go to you,
    kushka
    13th Jun 2013
    10:53pm
    Thank you Paddlesand Young Simmo,I too met my husband at 14 he was 23 ,but we knew even then ,My Son has turned his back on me ,but he is not happy with his life and has turned his back on other friends ,My Daughter sadly took the wrong path and has Cirhosis of the liver and Hep c ,she is now straight 2 years but the dammage is done ,they are 52 and 49 years old and no children with pretty lonely lives too with no partners ,,I am so sorry you lost a a precious little one at such a tender age it must haunt you even now after all these years ,how sad .Whilst you still have one another I wish you all the very best ,without my Treasure to share that cherry with me ,there is only my hope there is a hereafter ,as the pain of being afraid and alone is not worth hanging on to ,there has to be something better than a this crazy world ,on the other side ,Kushka
    Young Simmo
    13th Jun 2013
    11:00pm
    Yes kushka, we are in a similar situation, youngest son can not have children, and the oldest never wanted children so we are without Grand Kids to pamper. That doesn't worry me too much, but my wife is sad about no Grand kids. Now you have got me sounding like a real old softy.
    Pass the Ductape
    14th Jun 2013
    7:29am
    You know - what we need our Governments to do, is establish Nursing Homes for the aged which are manned mostly by older people.
    The buildings could be tax payer funded and most of the staff could consist of retired or seme-retired persons who are deemed fit enough to cope with most situations found in nursing homes.
    Yes, it would take a bit of working out but if we allow ourselves to think outside the square, the benefits could be enormous - for all concerned!
    Oldies looking after oldies, and a lot of us would do it for a pittance.
    Nan Norma
    14th Jun 2013
    8:53am
    What we need is properly trained people. People that take pride in their work. That will come about come when there is some prestige given to the job. The idea of having a diploma in aged care is to me a wonderful idea. And of course better payment for the qualification.
    Pass the Ductape
    15th Jun 2013
    7:12am
    Nan that wouldn't necessarily guarantee a better system.
    Most people who look after the aged in NH have qualifications of one sort or another. Empathy is the thing which is least affordable in a great many of these situations and on top of that, owners of these establishments have only one thought in mind - profit!
    My partner used to work in a nursing home many years ago and the daily shenanigans that went on in there broke her heart - so much that she left in despair after only six months.
    Staff numbers were continually cut to the bone; there was no time to properly communicate with patients; basic food supplement per week all worked out by a dietician which suggested nothing more than a ration, suited for survival mode only; facilities and supplies for cleaning staff that were totally inadequate and where these staff members often had to supply their own disinfectant and other cleaning materials etc. to get the job done - and a work load so great that it was impossible to clean patient's rooms at the required interval.
    BD
    14th Jun 2013
    11:07am
    Hi Everyone,

    All good comments, but SO VERY SAD, no one has any real answers!!

    There is elderly abuse all around us and more being done to "cover it up" than do anything about it....al al Aslyum Seekers!!!

    We need a National Body with "teeth" that can start heavily fining organisations and indeed individuals in charge of the care of the elderly, doesn't matter whether a family member is responsible or not.......anyone taking this on, should sign up to a strict code of practice!!

    Hey, I have worked in Federal and State Govt, at Centrelink HQ and DHS., but am getting to the point where I am too old now to be offered a job........I'll put myself forward as CEO of this "new organisation", if someone would "back me"!!!
    Nan Norma
    14th Jun 2013
    11:21am
    For a start other siblings in the family should be advised when Enduring Power of Attormey is given. I only found out after the event. when I asked my mother did she realize she had given my sister E.P of A she asked me what it was. By then my sister had already withdrawn money. There is more can be done but no one wants to put them selves out. In other words don't rock the boat.
    Young Simmo
    15th Jun 2013
    12:48am
    Nan Norma, I know it is not much comfort, but at least think, the young wrongdoers will be old one day, what goes around comes around. We might be up among the clouds, or in my case down among the Daisy's when time turns the full circle, but we can at least say, Ha, Ha, Ha, now you know what it feels like. Time for another RED,,,, it is only 10.47pm over here in the land of the lucky.
    Pass the Ductape
    15th Jun 2013
    7:25am
    BD - I hopefully supplied one answer (previous post).

    Like I said - we need to look outside the square and it would take a bit of work. But it does sound like you would qualify admirably for the job. Everyone wins!
    gerberry1
    14th Jun 2013
    12:07pm
    Thanks JillyPilly, will note the number down just in case I ever need it.
    Nan Norma - good idea, when I did my training in 1980 and got my Enrolled Nurse certificate, at that time it was talked about having all nursing homes run by Enrolled nurses and RN's. Now we are down to AIN's - some are good at their work, but a lot of Nursing homes now do not have staff that even have their AIN Cert 1V. And the staff without their AIN certificate get paid the same rate as those who have their Cert 1V so what incentive is there for them to get trained.
    Unfortunately the EN Certificate is no longer provided by the State Hospitals, they are provided by 'providers' who are supposed to run the course according to what is laid down. Cost now some $15,000 so tell me who died and gave a AIN the money to do the EN Cert.
    Unless you are lucky enough to get a 'scholarship' to the EN course then the EN's will become a dying breed.
    Most AIN's are there because it is a job, by the time you get your weekly wage which usually supplements the household income, they have got 'buckleys' in being able to fork out $15,000 ++ to take their education further.
    Who ever devised this system now in place needs their head read.
    We need good staff in Nursing homes, but more so, we need dedicated people owning the nursing homes and to delegate the moneys that they get properly so that staff get paid well, residents get fed and looked after well, maintenance of the property is ongoing, and that the owners of the Nursing homes get a reasonable return on their investment.
    The place I worked at in the 1980's the owner had this Nursing home as a tax write off against his other work or investments.
    Nursing rates for AIN's,EN & RN's need to be increased. Most people would not realise that a RN comes out of Uni with a base rate some $15,000 - $20,000 less that a teacher.
    Why is this so? Both are essential to Society, but I think it is because the Unions for Teachers were more vocal some years ago that the Unions for Nurses.
    The nosiest gets heard so get paid more. Nurses have never caught up.
    By the way, try and keep away from the Public Trustee and definitely the Guardianship Board. As one said - horrors from hell.
    What would be great if Life Choices could collate all the answers they get from this forum and send them to the relative Ministers, Federally and State for their information. May not do any good, but we can but try.
    Nan Norma
    14th Jun 2013
    12:39pm
    gerbe]erry I absolutly agree with your comment to "stay away from the Public Trustee and the Adult gaurdian." for me the PT was the lessor of two evils. the AD gaurdian was useless too. In eight years the A visited my mother four. They knew what happening. They knew the conditions my mother lived in and the amount of money she paid, and they did nothing.
    kushka
    14th Jun 2013
    8:43pm
    catsahoy thank you for your kind words ,the pen pal sounds like a good idea ,who is Drew ?you say I have to get details from ,you are kind ,xkushka
    catsahoy
    14th Jun 2013
    10:00pm
    KUSHKA, drew is the person in charge of the forums, if you go to the top of the page you will see how to contact him, i will also get in touch with YOUNG SIMMO, as he and i co oresspond outside this page, he will give the relevant infoemation, this is how we [met, although not having met physically we keep in touch, once you have got in touch with drew he can give you my address, and you your for me if you want, i do know how you feel about staying in as for 6 years for no apparent reason i became agoraphobic, i could not leave the house without panic attacks, only through the help of a VERY GOOD doctor and medication, i got over it, we can talk more of your fears later, a quick run down, i AM female, 73, married for 53 years, 3 children, 2 girls 1 boy, i live in melbourne, hope you can work out getting a note to DREW, but will give him my address and ask simmo to be of assistance, , take care, and get in touch through here if no other way, you could also give drew your e,mail address, we can commumicate that way as well, chin up, we will talk soon,
    Young Simmo
    14th Jun 2013
    11:44pm
    HELLO Kaye, could you please tell kushka and catsahoy how to get in touch with each other. I did work it out and got in touch with catsahoy, but right now I cannot remember how I did it. Of coarse a 73 year old brain is smarter than a one year old brain, EErrrrrrr I think.
    Cheers......Simo
    Nan Norma
    15th Jun 2013
    9:43am
    My only hope now is that these postings have brought more light on the subject of elder abuse It truely happens far more than anyone would care to believe. It happens in insiduous ways. The Elderly Abuse Provention Unit can only advise and refer. They do the best they can but they have no power. Another problem is that AG the PT do not work together
    BD
    15th Jun 2013
    10:59am
    Hi Everyone,

    This forum is getting very interesting and (hopefully) productive.

    Beyond my idea to try and start a "National Body" that actually does monitor these things, I think there is an "earlier" problem, i.e. a lot of older folks who would actually like to keep working, but can't, because they are forced into early retirement, as older workers are not being hired.

    I am 67 actually, but luckily have been working until about 6 months ago. Now the Gillard Govt's spending spree, the carbon tax and the general "consumer sentiment" (as they love to put it), has made it very difficult for me to get back into the workforce. I actually still do get interviews, but I think the interview panels are just trying to take my "knowledge" and pass it on to someone who will do the same work for much less...do I hear 457 visa's..so many times I have been interviewed for a senior role and then am told that the role has been re-advertised as a "junior position".....totally crazy and why we are in such a mess!!......

    I reckon the unemployment rate TRUE figure is more like 10%, if you counted those who wanted to work. This weeks "improved" figures, are simply because people have given up trying.....I have applied for over 100 jobs in the last 6 months and as I say, some get me interviews, but I still don't have a job!!!

    Being very qualified in the small business and Govt. sector, I actually have an idea how we could get more older workers back into the work force (notwithstanding the management of Retirement Homes, which I also think is a great idea).

    What we need to do is to provide businesses with a REAL incentive to get older workers back into the workforce and similarly remove the rorting that goes on with the current $2000 payment they can get if they employ someone for 3 months or more.

    In many cases that is all they do, then fire that first person and get another $2000, for another one....and they do this multiple times. I have even seen with my own eyes, a whole group of very qualified Australian contractors, sacked and there positions taken by re-hired other workers, need I say from where!!!.....but I will advise the company Telstra!!

    What really needs to happen is that the payment needs to be raised somewhat, (maybe to $5000), but also the employer has to employ that person for at least 12, or even better-24 months, (except for problems due to other issues, such as health and performance). That way more older workers would be back in the workforce, but not only that...paying (more) taxes, that has to happen to rectify the current Govt's "racked up" deficit.

    I do hope someone likes my idea for older workers, I live in Melbourne and have actually worked in the past for Jeff Kennett........not sure I agree with all his views, but maybe he is a person I can suggest this idea to..... to get someone in Govt. to listen....whatever some might think of him, he does seem to be able to "rattle some cages" what do we all think?

    Can't recall where everyone said they are located, but maybe this "initiative" and others that have been suggested, would benefit from a "workshop" team, either physically meeting up regularly or if preferred via Email.

    I am quite happy to provide my Email address and to "take this on" and coordinate it all, if there are others interested.....do let me know and I'll provide my Email address to this forum and those interested.....we can go from there!!
    Nan Norma
    15th Jun 2013
    11:10am
    I hear what your saying, and you are right, and it makes a lot of sense, but what we are talking about is a different issue.
    beryl
    15th Jun 2013
    11:02am
    I think its a disgrace that we are not offering our seniors the love and care thery need and they deserve. It is very hard work serving aged citizens and in other ways deeply rewarding.
    I dont respond to those who delight in making light of this subject nor should anyone else.
    Young Simmo
    15th Jun 2013
    11:10am
    petersj, I assume your last sentence is referring to my earlier comment. If that is correct I feel sorry for you, you must have a very boring life. Have you ever heard that old saying, "There is 2 sides to every story"?
    Nan Norma
    15th Jun 2013
    11:13am
    Peterj. You are right, it is a serious subject and not something to joke about. Would they be joking if we were talking about child abuse. Is it any wonder nothing gets done if even seniors make jokes.
    Young Simmo
    15th Jun 2013
    11:41am
    WOW, 2 sad old people, pity.
    Nan Norma
    15th Jun 2013
    3:46pm
    2 sad old people hey! Young Simmo if you had seen and experienced abuse first hand you wouldn't be joking about it. Until people start taking the problem of elder abuse serious we are never going to change anything.
    Young Simmo
    15th Jun 2013
    4:28pm
    Nan Norma, the 2 main things about this discussion for me is the comments, (A) "The young people only do the job for the money". (B) "The young people cannot do the job as good as us older people. The answer to (A) is they need the money to keep up with the society that the oldies created. (B) They are learning the job, obviously the older people were born with the necessary skills & didn't have to learn anything. P.S. I am 73 and because of a rebuilt engine, I am cruising along fairly nicely.
    Angel
    15th Jun 2013
    12:35pm
    G'day BD, I agree with all your idea's, yes, it cannot hurt to talk to Jeff, please do, I myself would love to work but there is ageism out there and I agree,I deal with young people all the time and think to myself I could do this so much better with my hands tied behind my back, they seem to not care and are only there for the money. As regards aged care I agree with the idea that older carers could run these facilities and give more empathy and cost a lot less as we could volunteer.
    BD
    15th Jun 2013
    1:00pm
    Hi Angel,

    Many thanks for "joining my thoughts"......and totally agree, there are many things I could/can do than my younger people, they are indeed only there for the money in most cases, that's why we have the problems we do.....some are Ok, but its also a "social network" sort of issue, they have access to things where they can boast about "getting money for nothing" and so it goes on, with more an more trying the same thing.

    I really am trying hard not to be racist but with so many people from other countries taking OUR jobs, I am sorry, but we have to get our own house in order" before this immigration "gravy train" becomes wreck!!! Maybe someone might say I should retire at my age, but hey, if I feel well, can work, am highly qualified, why should my destiny be dictated by someone from overseas........I want to retire (like many other older folks), when I chose to!!

    I will indeed start to process to contact Jeff K, to see what I might be bale to achieve.....any more to join the "workshop".........let's see how much of a "team" we can get by the end of the weekend.....maybe going to Jeff K. armed with a petition might also lend more weight to the argument(s)

    ..........come on everyone, let me hear from YOU like Angel!!!!
    Young Simmo
    15th Jun 2013
    1:19pm
    WOW, I haven't counted how many times in this subject people say, "The young people only do it for money". Excuse me but, how many of you people have worked your whole life for free?. Also the young people are not as good as you at their job, because they are LEARNING. I am 73, but I still try to look at the broader picture, instead of through a key hole.
    Nevagiveup
    15th Jun 2013
    2:18pm
    Hello everybody, I am brand new in here and would like to say I feel Young Simmo's comments are fairly close to the real world. Of coarse the young ones work for the money, not everybody is Gina Rinehart's offspring.
    catsahoy
    15th Jun 2013
    8:39pm
    HI MRS ESS, of course the young ones do it for money, i never worked for nothing, the young have to learn, but remember, they are employed, for the most part because they get LOWER WAGES, im afraid whoever thinks jeff kennet would be of any use is delusional, he sold everthing he got his grubby little hands on, that is why we pay top dollar for everything, because its all overseas, jeff kennet sold the hospitals, he closed down the few places that were available to the mentaly ill, these people were virtually tossed onto the street because there was nowhere for them to go, this is why so many times in relation to some court case, you hear the words,' not guily because of an imparired mental state, and the offenders are let off, because the jails dont want them, they know they are sick and jail will do nothing to solve there problems, .jeff kennet could fix NOTHING, by the way mrs ess, just love your meerkat,
    Nan Norma
    15th Jun 2013
    7:25pm
    We have all worked for the money. We have to live. There was a time when nursing the sick was seen as a dirty job, certainly not suitable for respectable ladies to do. Then came Florance Nightingale who changed all that. Then nursing was seen as a vocation, now it's seen as a career (not quite the same thing) where you hope to climb and higher and earn more money. Although there are those that truly want to heal the sick.
    Younger people do need to be trained if they are to understand the needs of elderly people. There was a time when a person just walked in child care centre and asked for a job. Not anymore. You may have been a child once but it doesn't make you the best person to care for children. Yes more mature people may well have a better understanding of how it feels to be older, but it doesn't mean they are the most suitable. We need younger, energetic people with empathy, who are willing to be trained in the special needs of elderly people. I also believe the day we cure dementia we will also stop a lot of abuse.
    catsahoy
    15th Jun 2013
    8:55pm
    hi young simmo, your tired old brain,lol. you gave drew your email, he gave you mine, you emailed me ,i emailed you, its gone on from there, bye the way, hows that footy team doing this saturday, he he, sorry, had to throw that in,
    BD
    16th Jun 2013
    9:39am
    Hi Everyone,

    OK, I'll drop the idea/offer of "managing" to push ahead with some ideas to get older workers back into the work force........there are more "against" than "for"!!

    Very disappointing everyone "seems" to WANT to find a solution, to both aged abuse and getting older people back to work, but yet again it all gets caught up in political arguments and goes nowhere.........maybe this is the overall problem in Australia as a whole!!!

    I note the point made (Mrs Ess), that "Jeff would do no good", but that's OK, your opinion as I said you don't have to like the person, we just need someone who might just be able to help. Don't just "rule out" someone.........maybe suggest someone whom YOU might think would help.....that would be much more constructive.

    Anyway, as I said, most of you have all seemed to have killed this idea at the outset.....so unless I receive more "positive" posts by the end of this weekend (and some emails to discuss this further outside of this rather "hostile" forum), I'm not pushing this again .........I'm not interested in crazy rants.........I hoped someone would actually be willing to help to do something!!!
    Sandi (SA)
    16th Jun 2013
    3:32pm
    KUSHKA here is Drew Patchell's email addy

    webmaster@yourlifechoices.com.au

    You could also send a personal message to Catsahoy which is a private service for members. Where CATSAHOY's name is on the side of a post (but only where it's in Blue)
    you will bring up her name and a send a private message and YLC will forward it to her.

    The reason I say where here name is in BLUE is because she is logged in when she adds to the forum. I presume where the name is in BLACK members are not logged in as you cannot access this feature unless you are logged in.
    beryl
    16th Jun 2013
    4:55pm
    Nan Norma I know exactly;y what you mean. I have seen terrible abuse and for many Australians this is indeed a very painful topic. Incidentally I send my compassion.
    I have sent you a private message Nan.
    Nan Norma
    16th Jun 2013
    9:38pm
    petersj. I haven't received your message. Maybe I'm looking in the wrong place. (my emails)
    beryl
    16th Jun 2013
    8:32pm
    Also Young Simmo I was not referring to you. I dont even know you.
    catsahoy
    16th Jun 2013
    8:58pm
    B.D. I THINK YOU GOT THE ABOVE MESSAGE MIXED UP, IT WAS NOT MRS ESS THAT MADE THE REMARK ABOUT JEFFKENNET, BUT ME, I THINK YOUR IDEA OF OLDER PEOPLE IN THE WORKFORCE IS GREAT, BUT WHO WANTS TO EMPLOY US?THE JOB MARKET IS STRECHED TO THE LIMIT AS IT IS, ONLY 3 WEEKS AGO A FRIEND [IN FACT THE WHOLE WAREHOUSE WHERE SHE WORKED WERE TOLD ON A FRIDAY THE PLANT WAS CLOSING, AND MOVING TO ANOTHER LOCATION, WHICH WAS TO FAR FOR ANY OF THE PRESENT WORKERS TO GET TO, THEY WENT INTO WORK ON THE TUESDAY AND WERE HANDED THEIR REDUNDANCY PACKAGES, MY FRIEND IS ONLY 53, AND NOONE WANTS TO KNOW HER, JUST LOOK IN THE SUPERMARKETS FOR A START. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME A SENIOR PERSON SERVED YOU, THEY ONLY WANT JUNIORS OR [DARE I SAY IT] IMMIGRANTS, BECAUSE THEY WORK FOR LOWER WAGES, AND JUNIORS ARE ON LOW WAGES ANYWAY,I KNOW THEY ARE SUPPOSED TO RECIEVE THE BASIC WAGE, BUT I DO KNOW SOME ARE NOT, AS FOR JEFF KENNET, NO I DONT THINK HE WOULD BE OF ANY USE WHATEVER, AND IM SORRY TO SAY, I CANNOT THINK OF ANYONE AT THE MOMENT,BUT DONT GIVE UP, IF WE PUT OUR COLLECTIVE HATS ON MAYBE WE WILL COME UP WITH SOMEONE,
    catsahoy
    16th Jun 2013
    9:07pm
    YOUNG SIMMO, THOUGHT I MAY HAVE BEEN ABLE TO MESSAGE, BUT HER NAME IS IN BLACK, SO NO ONLINE, CAN ONLY DO IT IF IN BLUE,
    BD
    17th Jun 2013
    9:50am
    Hi Catsahoy,

    My apologies, I did indeed mistake YOUR reply as coming from Mrs Ess.........but thanks anyway for pointing it out and indeed for your additional "reasoned" response.

    All you say is correct, but we will have to go back to employing older folks at some point, we will all be in that category fairly soon......if we keep going as we are then the only people in the workforce will be from overseas, which I simply don't think is sustainable.....but we have such crazy Govt. policies at present, that you are right, for the moment trying to get a reasonably paid job is hopeless.........

    It's disappointing that not more of this forums respondents have at least considered who we might collectively contact on these issues, as I suggested....but you have given me further "energy" to at least give this a little more "response time" before I "give up" the cause.....once again I say COME ON PEOPLE, I am really trying to get a "cause" going here, but I cannot do it alone!!!!!!!!!..........pledge your support for the "workshop" and do send any ideas as to who you might think we could approach......despite the "indifference" I will be trying Jeff and also Lord Mayor Robert Doyle......
    Nan Norma
    17th Jun 2013
    2:26pm
    BD. I sent email to any body I thought might be the least bit interested, but I got no where. When I complained to the the Adult Guardian they would refer me to the Public trustee and the Public Trustee would refer me back to the adult guardian.
    Pommy
    17th Jun 2013
    10:18am
    "a single, or repeated act, or lack of appropriate action, occurring within any relationship where there is an expectation of trust which causes harm or distress to an older person”.
    This definition is not broad enough. Abuse is not always recognisable to the abused. For example, a seniors club member, aged 93, was being driven around by a "friend", for which he was very grateful. This was almost a daily occurrence. The "friend" lived just a couple of doors away. It was purely by chance that we found out that the "friend" was actually charging $10 a trip to the old man. If he took him to a local club for lunch, the old man paid for both meals and handed over money to play the pokies. So not only did this "friend" receive $20 for the trip, he had his lunch and entertainment paid for. The matter was referred to the family, who were also unaware of the monetary side, and had been very grateful to this good Samaritan's friendship with their father. The family looked into it and discovered that this so called "friend" has cost their father, hundreds of dollars. They went to the police and got a restraining order which prevented this man from any contact with the old man. As the old man had willingly paid over the money, it would have been very difficult to charge the person. This kind of abuse is insidious.
    Nan Norma
    17th Jun 2013
    1:31pm
    Pommy, How about this one. The Public Trustee was paying my sister $50 for 'transport' even during the months when my mother was bed ridden until she died. I complained about it but they did nothing.
    As I said in my previous postings, I couldn't get anybody to do anything. Even my local MP. I've learnt that people believe all carers are angels. But as you know they are not.
    Tezza
    17th Jun 2013
    1:11pm
    BD, I have just completed a quick review of the posts which occurred over the weekend.
    I believe that people who access this site should keep relating their concerns with the aged care system and share actual cases without, at this stage, trying to solve the issues. You can be assured that these posts are being read by government personnel as well as aged care providors and aged care employees.
    If you are 'very qualified' in the small business and government sectors you should obtain an ABN and become a consultant. If your knowledge and capabilities are required, companies will be prepared to pay for such experience.
    More companies are engaging consultants or contractors these days as they are not encumbered by overheads nor the expensive cost 'add -ons' of employing a person and they also avoid possible industrial issues. This will also happen in the aged care industry where a company will contract to supply labour to facilities. More than likely the labour will have English as their second language. They will not be taking jobs from 'Australians', they will get the job because they are prepared to work for a lower rate of pay. They also will possibly be 'ripped off' by their employer.
    As the groundswell increases in relation to aged care abuse and issues, governments will hone in on the case like a 'dog on a bone' because of the vote potential.

    Latest on my aged care issues, poor old Mum had monies removed from her purse in her bedside drawer in her current nursing home. Needless to say we did not inform her of the theft and we now will not leave any more than a few dollars in her purse. Have also removed any details re her home address. I have also set up a small device that will record (visual), anyone who opens her drawer. It will hopefully be like catching mud crabs. I will then file the data and wait for the opportune moment to expose either the home,cuplprit or both.
    All, keep the posts coming.
    Nan Norma
    17th Jun 2013
    1:29pm
    Tezza, I so hope your right, that the government will read this.
    beryl
    17th Jun 2013
    3:50pm
    Nan Norma I sent it in the private messages.
    BD
    17th Jun 2013
    6:05pm
    Hi Tezza,

    Sorry to disappoint you, I am a consultant with an ABN, but all my experience and skills counts for nought at this point unless I am prepared to work for $20/hour, which I am not!!

    Aged care issues will only escalate further until we start to "employ" people with the right and "real" skills, not those who simply will work for less, but in reality often don't work at all!!

    I have my doubts like Nan Norma, if you really believe Govt. personnel look at these posts.....you are dreaming I think!!!
    catsahoy
    17th Jun 2013
    7:37pm
    im afraid i to ,like nana norma, dont think GOVT personnel would look at these files, and if they did i dont think they would care, i think 99per cent of ANY govt officials are feathering there own nest, and couldnt give a fig about the ordinary aussie out there doing it tough, they have just given themselves ANOTHER RISE, while we have to eat crow, an exeample, i live in ministry, and last week recieved a letter saying the rent was rising
    14 dollars a fortnight, on asking why,i was told we recieved a 15dollar increase in march, so up goes the rent, one step foeward one back, B/D/ I THink the lack of response may be that a big percentage of people who come onto this forum are like myself, 73, and because of health reasons could not go back into the workforce, i would certainly back you in your quest to get jobs for those who want them, im glad you have not given up on your idea, maybe JEFF KENNET, could do something, just my opinion that he couldnt,[or wouldnt] i personaly have no time for the man, but hey, i could be entierly wrong, the cap is still on and thinking,
    Nan Norma
    17th Jun 2013
    7:54pm
    Hi, Due to health reasons I would not be looking for a job, but I'm never bored. I'm thankful that own my own home. I truly feel for people like you. can you tell me what 'ministry' housing is. I've never heard of it before.
    I'm passionate about elder abuse because I saw what went on with my mother and was helpless to do anything. Because I tried, I was abused my self. It was terrible.
    catsahoy
    17th Jun 2013
    7:47pm
    B.D. the only reason i pointed out that it was me not mrsess that had written that post was because of my comments re jeff kennet, and i didnt want anyone taking umbridge at the remarks and attacking mrs ess, reading your post again i think you may have more chance with ROBERT DOYLE,
    catsahoy
    19th Jun 2013
    9:19pm
    NANA NORMA. ministry is housing commission, our rents are determined by our income, so every time we get a raise, the rent increases, as the rent is based on 25pc of you income, so if you get an extra 10 dollars, the housing commission want 2,50 of you 10 dollars, so you never get anywhere as we get an increase, but the cost of living goes up as well, BOB HAWKE had the right idea, a few years ago he wanted to peg prices, all well and good said people, but when it came to pegging wages, OH NO, PEOPLE DIDNT REALISE THEY COULDNT HAVE IT BOTH WAYS, and his idea was howled down,
    Nan Norma
    20th Jun 2013
    4:19pm
    Hi, Just hadn't heard the housing commission refered to as ministry before.
    catsahoy
    20th Jun 2013
    7:09pm
    NANA NORMA, it gets called all kinds of things, none of which i can repeat here, he he,

    21st Jun 2013
    8:50am
    My father died 7 years ago. I contacted the Elder Abuse Unit but I was unable to get my father to say anything as he was at the mercy of my sister who lived in the same suburb. I live interstate. He had given her his car to use full time on the condition she would take him shopping once a week.

    The abuse my father suffered at her hands was unbelievable. Not physical, but psychological and financial. On his demise we found over $20,000 in IOU's a thousand dollars each time. Of course the money was never repaid .. Threatening letters sent to him that unless he bought her a new car she would not be taking him shopping after the 13th of the month. He died on the 11th from a massive heart attack brought on, I believe, from the stress of what was going to happen on the 13th.

    I might also add that on one of the shopping trips she got into an argument with hin, left him on the side of the road about 2 kms from his home and he had to drive the car home himself, without a licence at the age of 93; a man suffering prostate cancer.

    There was a lot more abuse going on which I will not go into here but suffice to say
    I have chosen to cut off all contact with my sister and I will never, ever speak to her again.
    Nan Norma
    21st Jun 2013
    9:50am
    Radish, How awful for your father and for you. My mother was the same. The one time she complained about about never having any money of her own the Public Trustee visited and spoke to my sister about it. My mother said never again would she complain as my sister got really angry with her after. So Radish, what is the answer if those that can do something, do nothing. I believe they are only interested in getting their wage every week and don't want to rock the boat.

    25th Feb 2016
    7:36pm
    I'm interested in the definition of elder abuse. My mother was abused by a relative taking money with menaces - threatening physical harm. That was certainly elder abuse. But how far does it extend?

    For example, a relative will not allow either his parents or his mother-in-law to see their grandchildren or to communicate with the children. He is widowed, so his mother-in-law has lost not just a daughter but also contact with her daughter's children. Both grandmothers have been victims of vicious lies by this man. His lies have severed family ties and resulted in his mother suffering bullying and unfair accusations from other family members and his father being cut off from his siblings.

    This man ignores all family occasions, and on the rare occasions he sees his mother he is abusive. He never actually sees his mother-in-law.

    Because both grandmothers are in their mid-sixties, and quite mentally and physically agile, relatives say its not ''elder abuse''. Is it?


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