How to flirt without saying a word

Not everyone has a way with words, but for those looking for love the good news is that there are ways you can flirt without saying a word.

And you know, these ‘strategies’ aren’t limited to courting the opposite sex. You can also use these handy hints to make your everyday interactions easier. In a sense, flirting (for want of a better word) can act as a type of ‘social lubricant’, so use it if you can!

Here are five flirting tips for the fellas and five for the ladies.

For the fellas

1. Spread out
Supposedly, spreading out indicates control of personal and physical space and, although it may be painful to sit next to a person doing this on the train, it’s meant to convey dominance and, evidently, boosts your attractiveness to women.
(Note: our copyeditor strongly contends this point. What do you think?)

2. Be open
Men who cross their arms close off their bodies to other people, making it all the more likely that your body language can be misconstrued as an ‘off limits’ sign. So uncross your arms and stand with your legs slightly apart and you’ll be seen as more attractive, active and persuasive.

3. Don’t smile so much
Too much smiling can be seen as a sign of femininity and timidity, which does not go down well with the fairer sex. It doesn’t mean you should wipe that smile off your face permanently, as women also like men who are approachable and fun, but it may just pay to dial it down a notch.

4. Touch your face
Every now and then it’s good to run your hand along your jawline, or gently rub your beard or stubble. It reminds the girls of your masculine features. The lower part of your face is also linked to your testosterone levels. A wide jawline indicates high testosterone levels, but even if you don’t have a jawline like a young Robert Redford, touching it will still remind a woman of your masculinity.

5. Eye contact
Eye contact is one of the biggest turn-ons for both sexes so, every few minutes, sweep the room with your eyes, making sure that she sees your glance. But don’t make it too intense, you just want to let her know you’ve spotted her, otherwise you may seem a bit creepy.

For the ladies

1. Smile
It may not work for the guys, but for the girls, a big friendly smile is a huge hint that you’re interested. So go on, unleash those pearly whites and you may get lucky tonight! Oh, and couple that smile with eye contact – it works really well on the fellas. Simply hold a guy’s gaze for three seconds then look away, then look back quickly – but only for a second. It really works a treat.

2. Dancing
Whether by yourself, with a partner or with friends, dancing is a seductive act that almost speaks for itself. And you don’t even have to be Anna Pavlova for this to work. Dancing attracts attention to all the feminine aspects of the body, making it a very sensuous and alluring act.

3. Be good at what you do
Whatever it is you do best, make sure you’re doing it around him (or her). Being good at any task, no matter how big or small, is very attractive to men. So put your best foot forward and make sure he sees it!

4. Touch un-erogenous zones
Okay, so this one requires a little more ‘up-close-and-personal’ interaction, but touching a man on the back, elbow, wrist or shoulder sets him at ease and, although it’s not sure-fire seductive technique, it lets them know that you’re not completely inaccessible. For all their bluff and blundering, men can be quite shy when it comes to the opposite sex, so brushing past them breaks down their barriers and can allow for easier interactions.

5. Flick your hair
It’s an oldie but a goodie: the timeless hair flick. Simply push your hair back over your shoulder and show a little bit of neck and he’ll quickly get the message that you’re interested. Be careful though. This move can encourage strong reactions. There’s an old saying that goes if you touch your hair it shows you like a fella, so make sure you like a man before you motion with your mane!

Do you have any flirty tips? Do you ever flirt for fun? Any tips for our members?

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Getting back into the dating game
Five best websites to make friends
Sex and older women

Written by Leon Della Bosca

Leon Della Bosca has worked in publishing and media in one form or another for around 25 years. He's a voracious reader, word spinner and art, writing, design, painting, drawing, travel and photography enthusiast. You'll often find him roaming through galleries or exploring the streets of his beloved Melbourne and surrounding suburbs, sketchpad or notebook in hand, smiling.
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