The Meeting Place

Millennial women are 'worried,' 'ashamed' of out-earning boyfriends and husbands


The University of Chicago found that a wife making even $5,000 a year more than her husband was associated with a greater risk of divorce.


http://www.cnbc.com/2017/04/18/millennial-women-worry-about-out-earning-boyfriends-and-husbands.html

7 comments

When I first met my wife she was earning a good deal more than I was, she was a level three Public Servant and I had started at the bottom as a 001 Crown Employee.  As we are both adults and were capable of making mature decisions about personal relationships, it simply was not an issue.  

I think that a man who has a problem with his spouse making more money than him has very serious self esteem issues to start with, if he lets this issue influence his personal relationship he would have to be very immature and probably not deserving of his partner anyway.

After all I don't recall my wife being put out when the situation was reversed and I was two levels ahead of her on the wage scale.

Trying to see it from a womans perspective, I can't see why being successful is seen as a negative, you put in the work, you get more money, this is how capitalism should work.  Maybe this will open the door for men to stay at home with the children so that successful women pursue their careers, it would not be the end of the world.

A woman being divorced by a man because she is earning more than him should think of it as dodging a bullet and ridding herself of non-supportive deadwood, it is the 21st. century after all.

Well said. The whole family benefits, so it should make no difference. A good marriage is a partnership. You work as a team and if a male feels threatened he probably doesn't want to be part of a team

I could not agree more ex PS if that sort of thing makes a person feel inferior -- good to find out early

I think only a PC left wing civil servant would even think about this ridiculous topic . 

Rafael put the topic up Brocky, the last person who could be described as a left wing civil servant I would have thought. 

I have known high income women who on having children have been the ones to return to work while the husbands have stayed at home to care for the babies/children and it has worked, financially, in their best interests quite successfully for them. 

Sad but true Unfortunately there is is also still a social stigma I believe still in existence for women who in high achieving high paying jobs find it difficult to find partners of the same achievements and status and are regarded as marrying below them if  their husband is not of the same status. 

Yes your right Viv .. apologise  Raffy .

my comment was aimed at Ex PS. 

Still think it's a ridiculous topic .

 

That really surprises me..one would think in 2017..all men would welcome the fact that their wife is doing well..

Seems that some of us are still living in the 19th. century.  Interesting that Brockys mate brings up the subject and Brocky attacks me.

I take it that all of your remarks would still stand but be directed at Raphael, if not that would make you,  Brocky, nothing more than a hypocrite thus rendering your opinion worthless.  

Pity, I hate wasting time and it looks like I have wasted too much time considering the opinions of a feckless windbag.  A mistake I will remedy immediatley.

I think that either spouse doing well is good for the entire family, as long as the family is taken care of who cares who is making the biggest finnancial contribution.

 

I put the post up as a matter of interest 

i would have loved to take time off when younger becuase my partner had a great income

cant understand the mind of feminist who after fighting for and getting equal pay , jobs in public sector based on gender and not merit , and expecting their partners to earn as much if not more 

hypocrites 

 

so pull your your head in PS

 

No Raphael, you pull your head in, I did not attack you or your opinion as you did not express one, I expressed one of my own.  It was your little buddie that went on the  attack and when it was pointed out that he had made a mistake he did not even have the moral fortitude to admit his mistake.

But never mind you can get together later tonight sit in the corner of a darkened room and  whisper in each others ear how marvelous each of you is.

this is the problem with you public sector lefties

cannot debate objectively and resort to attacks

sad

"I think only a PC left wing civil servant would even think about this rediculous topic". What do you think Raphael, does it come under the catagory of personal attack.  Sad enough for you.

There is an old saying, don't give it out if you can't take it.  You and your little mate are quite happy to make personal attacks on people who don't agree with you but seem to be a little sensative when the same tactics are used against you.

You nulify your own arguement by using the  term "public sector lefties", and that is extremely sad.

As I have said before, time is short and I will not waste it on those who do not deserve the time required to answer them.  Answering your often silly comments degrades me so I choose to ignore you in the future.

So you keep saying , 

 

How does one "get together" when there is no line of division? Raphael and Brocky are siamese twins separated only by their own imagination which is then imposed onto us. In other words, they are both the banned Pete who loves to abuse males who do not suck up to his right wing views. The way he is attacking you ex PS reminds me of the way he attacked Geomac at every opportunity.

Robi - I don't understand your post

I am not imposing anything on "you"

am I not allowed to have a dialogue with Brocky or another person in this forum?

Sure, dialogue with yourself all you want Pete but be assured that at least some of us know that is exactly what you are doing and god knows why!!!

Pete = Brocky = Raphael

Seems like you're the one who's got a wild imaginatuon

Brocky is in Singapore . He flew out this morning 

we probably won't here from him for a few weeks  He's off to Bangkok and then I think the UK

 

Yadda, yadda, yadda. Have been here too long to be a naive twit anymore. Were you Jaguar too?

I'll leave you to your delusions babe

havent got time for this childish conversation 

have a nice day 

And I'll leave you to your conversations with self bubs. You must think we are all idiots on here desperately hanging out for your contributions of sexual innuendo between self and self. LOL

Hey Raphael,

Image result for the deluded do not know they are deluded

You're right Reagan

berween this one and foxy I don't know whose more delusional 

I would not take too much notice Robi, an opinion can only effect you if you respect the one giving it.  I have chosen to handle the matter in my own way.  I still believe that everyone is entiltied to an opinion, the validation of that opinion is the way in which people respond or in some cases don't respond.

I think we are all coloured in our views by our own experiances, the trick is to try and be tolerant of an opposing point of view.

Image result for wife earning more than husband cartoon

Reagan, I agree. Women are literally growing balls these days. lol

Speaking from experience Frank? hahaha

This is "fake" news people.

its from cnbc and the based on University research

I agree with Frsnk

Belongs in New Idea or New Left Green Weekly .

I keep agreeing with Frank .

Talking about Wimen with balls what happened to Foxy ?

I can only guess she is feeling a bit of remorse and shame after her attackes on me.

I have forgiven her though, and told her so.

Hopefully she comes back on soon.

Yes I am sure she has something to contribute .

plenty of reality tv shown on still

farners need to marry at first sigght

Survivor Kitchen Rules

Big Brothel

The Biggest Woozer

list is endless

How's Sarah going with the Cab Sav

Dont get her too drunk now

Tomorrow RAF . She stayed up there whilst I came back for Royal Show . Delivered daughter back to boarding school today . On SW at 8.55 on the morrow .

SQ

Eastern Orient Express to Bangers on 22nd 

Nice - enjoy

Young Sarah's having good long break

She doesn't work RAF 

thought she was a lawyer

 

retured young eh. lucjky girl

Yes she did do law at Uni . But never practised ,

She had independent means .

"... a wife making even $5,000 a year more than her husband was associated with a greater risk of divorce."

No wonder to me as she would have the financial resources to get out of a relationship that turned sour or abusive.

So many women are trapped by financial dependence and are so afraid of 'how they and the kids they will survive'. Sadly, the support for these people is overwhelmed in Australia, from what I can see.

As are many blokes I might add, their futures blighted at times by enormous Centrelink payments for the ex-spouse's welfare. So much depends on 'honest' reporting to Centrelink.

Rorts galore on both sides when it comes to the mighty dollar IMO. Very sad for the kids involved.

Very appreciative it never happened to me. We had yo-yo fortunes re earning capacities (husband/wife) over the years and always regarded the results as joint resources.

 

And tht is how it should work RnR.  After an interview with CSA, where my ex-wife told them that I had made more than adequate provision for our son I was ordered to pay a percentage of my wage to my ex-wife every fortnight.  So we entered into a farsical arrangement where I transfered a set amount into my ex-wifes account every fortnight and she transfered it back the next day.

Divorces don't have to be ugly, I gave my ex-wife a $5,000.00 Credit Card to ensure that in emergencies my son would be taken care of, she never used it.

If we put the childrens welfare first we can't go too far wrong.

Marriage is not a competition, it is a partnership, it may not always work out, but that does not mean that one or the other is a villain, it just means that at some stage the wrong decision was made.

You are one of the lucky ones PS

Or perhaps you're in the majority.

good for you 

 

Most women who earn high salaries are high achievers..they are also comfortable in their own skin and are competent and skilled socially...

For some men.."living up" to such a wife can be a great challenge...some feel inadequate and resentful and in my opinion...it's not just the money that causes the problem..it's all the other factors I mentioned above..


Thea, you could be right. The married men I know appear to want their wives to reach their full potential. I do know of 2 couples where the wife was a high earner, high acheiver and the relationship did not last. But I dont know all of the facts and I dont ask.  

Thea, I agree, it is a pity that a spouse feels it incumbant upon them to live up to their partners or even societies expectations. It does not matter whether it is the wife or the husband who is earning more money it should not be an issue.  Ego is such a hard thing to supress or understand.

Where is it written that the higher money earner is is actually the one that contributes the most to the family wellbeing.

7 comments



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