The Meeting Place

Struggling with Depression

Posted by redbean

Hi there

I do struggle with depression and wonder if there is anyone out there in the same boat. What sort of help is available in the community and what works for you?

I would appreciate if you could share with me your experience with depression.

Posted: 29 June 2010 02:01 PM

Posted by PlanB

don’t myself Redbean but I know a few that do--it is a dreadful thing--there is “Beyond Blue” I hear that does have help.

Posted by toot2000

I hope someone on the forum will be prepared to talk about their problems with depression but I doubt it. There is a huge stigma connected with ‘mental illness’ - people turn off and tune out whenever it’s mentioned. It’s just another illness afterall but no one wants to talk about it. As PlanB has already mentioned Byond Blue is one possible help site and the Black Dog Institute is another one. Good luck.

Posted by redbean

Hi there

Thanks for the response. I certainly know about those two organisations.

Infact, I used to belong to an online forum called DepressioNet which was started by a courageous lady by the name of Leanne Pethick.;=430025&view;=&numtoview;=&start;=&sort;=&filter1;=&filter1val;=&filter2;=&filter2val;=&filter3;=&filter3val;=&advanced;=&pagestart;=389

It even received fundings from the Dept of Health and Ageing until Leanne was forced to hand over the running of this forum to another group and this group ran it to the ground. It was a sad day for the members when this happened in March 2010.


I too suffer from depression. DepressioNet was great and a real support but it was partly closed down because its computer became corrupted. I have not needed them again until just recently so don't know if they are available now. I am happy to talk to any other person going thru this. There is still so much misunderstanding etc. in the community about it. In my own case my marriage of 41 years is disintegrating because of my depression. My husband [u]tries[/u]. But he is like many men - self-contained, objective, unemotional, scared to discuss anything remotely to do with feelings, and generally not giving me the emotional support I crave.

Blessings, hjww[color=blue][/color]

If you have a good rapport with your doctor, he/she would be able to put you in touch with therapy groups etc.

I'd imagine the most important issue for you is to find someone you trust, or a group , who are experiencing similar problems. Sometimes just sharing with another person in the same boat can help.

I noticed references to depressioNet in this thread. Leanne Pethick together with a group of volunteers has put depressioNet back online. It is the same friendly supportive site it was but now run by Leanne and a bunch of old members who could see it's value and have contributed their time to rebuild the site and bring it back into existence to provide the wonderful support it does.

The trouble with the management that took over the site was that they tried to turn it into an online health service instead of the peer support group it was created to be, they just didn't get what it was about. They actually changed the name to "Depression Services" under the depressioNet banner.

Anyway just thought I would mention that it was back online. :)


I've seen many changes made in the media, people's perception, due to so many people suffering from Depression and its great to see that this discussion is also contributing to the change in attitudes.
I'm suffering from Depression and may have done so since childhood but its always been seen as something that should not be talked about or told one will get over it, what ever that means.
I was lucky that while at uni, Counseling was offered free to students, which made it easy for me to seek help but due to the nature of my illness my doctor eventually sent me to see a Psychiatrist. At this point in time the medication prescribed help me cope with my Depression because I understand what, why and how this illness affects me.
Support from family and friends is very important too and to be open about one's condition helps them understand the illness too.
Hope this helps? There is more understanding and support now in our society.

I refer to my above post and have completely changed my view about the new depressioNet now online.    I do not recommend the new site.   Online peer support forums can cause more damage than good.   Talking to a counsellor or understanding member of family or friend would be far more helpful.

.".he is like many men - self-contained, objective, unemotional, scared to discuss anything remotely to do with feelings, and generally not giving me the emotional support I crave."

With respect, that stereotyping of men is antiquated, wrong and doesn't help. Here is another example (excerpt given below) of stereotying of men where the female researcher was astonished but was able to retain her scientific independence and not dismiss the findings - which a feminist would have done, or worse, would have set the research brief to focus exclusively on women so no 'male' findings were possible, as is done regarding violence affecting men (eg feminist domestic violence 'research').

Kisses and Cuddles make for Happy Men
Updated July 14, 2011
Contrary to conventional wisdom, cuddling and caressing are more important to men than women in a long-term relationship, according to a new international study.
Researchers studied responses from adults in the United States, Brazil, Germany, Japan and Spain, and discovered that men were more likely to be happy in their relationship and that frequent kissing or cuddling was an accurate predictor of happiness for men.
"I was a little surprised," said Julia Heiman, the director of Indiana University's Kinsey Institute, which conducted the study that will be published in the Archives of Sexual Behaviour journal.
"Some of the stereotypes we have are borne out of what we feel comfortable believing - that men prefer sex, or women prefer intimacy over sex, for example," she added.>

Your first point of call should be your doctor who will be there to case manage and link you with professional support. However as well as that and the links already put forward by posters here, there is also support from the usual helpers in society, the churches, such as the Baptist church in our area that facilitates a non-denominational, nonreligious, depression support group.

As far as your husband is concerned, it is known that carers/partners also need support, but effective support is also hard come by. No offence meant but we all have to be mature enough to accept that needy people can be draining, especially for those close to them who if older are also likely to be suffering painful and limiting conditions.

What you can do is be a member of any interest group possible, the church auxiliary is one, where you can get social contact and invite individuals to visit and you might visit them. If you can help others, even by sitting with them or making a cup of tea, that will help them and you. I do have some understanding of the dreadful black dog that is depression, having some close to me who suffer and knowing that some of them might find it impossible to even put pen to paper. It is for some the most dreadful, debilitating disorder and very poorly understood by the community