With Viagra being such a hit, Pfizer is bringing forth a whole line of drugs oriented towards improving the performance of men in today’s society.
- Directra – a dose of this drug given to men before leaving on car trips caused 72 per cent of them to stop and ask directions when they got lost, compared to only 0.2 per cent in the control group.
- Projectra – Men given this experimental new drug were far more likely to actually finish a household repair project before starting a new one.
- Childagra – Men taking this drug reported a sudden, overwhelming urge to perform more child-care tasks – especially cleaning up spills and “little accidents.”
- Complimentra – In clinical trials, 82 per cent of middle-aged men administered this drug noticed that their wives had a new hairstyle. Currently being tested to see if its effects extend to noticing new clothing.
- Buyagra –Married and otherwise attached men reported a sudden urge to buy their sweeties expensive jewellery and gifts after talking this drug for only two days. Still to be seen: whether the drug can be continued for a period longer than your favorites store’s return limit.
- Nega-Viagra – Has the exact opposite effect of Viagra. Currently undergoing clinical trials on sitting US presidents.
- Nega-Sportagra – This drug had the strange effect of making men want to turn off televised sports and actually converse with other family members.
- Flatulagra – This complex drug converts men’s noxious intestinal gases back into food solids. Special bonus: dosage can be doubled for long car rides.