Friday funnies: A lot of love, a little laughter

It’s that time of the year again. The time when people rush to the store to buy last-minute flowers, spend small fortunes on fancy dinners or – having forgotten the whole ordeal until minutes before their partner walks in – declare that they themselves are the present.

Whether you’re single, married or all things in between, we hope you enjoy these Valentine funnies.

A man was walking through a magical forest when a gnome appeared before him.
“If you step on a purple mushroom, you will be forced to marry the ugliest person in the world!” declared the gnome.
The man considered this, but proceeded through the forest, watching his step carefully. He was nearly clear of the forest when a beautiful woman appeared in front of him and announced, “We have to get married.”
“What, why?” asked the man.
“I stood on one of those pesky mushrooms!” she replied.

A woman awoke from her nap on Valentine’s Day and told her husband, “I just had the most extraordinary dream that you gave me an expensive diamond necklace! What could that mean?”
The man looked at her knowingly, “You’ll find out tonight.”
That night, he returned home and gave his wife a small package. Thrilled, she opened it and found a book titled, ‘The Meaning of Dreams‘.

Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. Their wedding ceremony wasn’t fancy.
But the reception was great.

What did the French chef give his wife on Valentine’s Day?
A hug and a quiche!

What did the flame say to the other on Valentine’s Day?
We’re a perfect match!

What do you call the world’s smallest Valentine’s Day card?
A valen-teeny!

What did the stamp say to the Valentine’s Day card?
Stick with me and you’ll go places.

How did the phone propose to her girlfriend?
She gave her a ring.

What did one sheep say to the other?
I love ewe.

Did we forget any Valentine’s Day classics? Share them in the comment section below.

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Liv Gardiner
Liv Gardiner
Writer and editor with interests in travel, lifestyle, health, wellbeing, astrology and the enivornment.
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