How to grieve for your job if you’ve been made redundant

Font Size:

Being made redundant is a heavy blow at the best of times, but if the coronavirus pandemic has severely affected the industry you work in and you’ve been laid off as a result, it’s bound to feel particularly tough – both financially and emotionally.

Unsurprisingly, not having a job during the pandemic – when finding a new one in a shrunken market seems almost impossible – is affecting people’s mental health.

New research by mental wellness platform Modern Health has found that a third of those unemployed because of COVID-19 say they’ve felt more stress and anxiety recently than any other time in their life, while 50 per cent of those surveyed say they’re finding it difficult to sleep as a result of financial worries, and 83 per cent are feeling a loss of control.

So what is the psychological impact of redundancy during this already uncertain time, and how can you help yourself to accept what’s happened and move forward?

What you’re feeling is natural and valid
One of the things we’ve all heard – and possibly said – quite often over the past few months is the caveat that “other people have it worse”. This may always be true, but the loss of lives and widespread pain brought about by the coronavirus crisis doesn’t take away from what you’re going through personally.

“Redundancy can have a huge impact on mental health and trigger a range of mental health issues. It may cause feelings of worry, anxiety, stress and depersonalisation. It may impact your sleep and confidence. You may also feel a loss similar to bereavement,” says Babylon therapist Dr Helen Rutherford.

Feeling secure and well-provided for is a basic human need, says psychiatrist Dr Andrew Iles, of the Priory Wellbeing Centre in Oxford.

“Anything which seeks to undermine that is likely to cause us to feel worried, depressed and fearful,” he says. “Jobs define us all; for those of us who have children, it is one way we perform our duty of being a role model. Losing one’s job can lead to feelings of embarrassment and shame, or the fear that other people might see us as unsuccessful.”

Let yourself grieve
The loss of a job can affect us in similar ways to the loss of a relationship, loved one, or anything else important in your life – and you might go through stages while processing the loss, such as anger, bargaining and despair, before you’re ready to move on to acceptance.

“Grief is the price we pay for loving someone or investing our feelings heavily in a job or a business. If you gain from being close, or heavily invested in something, you grieve when that is taken away,” says Priory mental health expert Dr Paul McLaren.

And this isn’t something we need to be ashamed of or worry isn’t normal. “Grief is not an illness, it’s a natural process of psychological adjustment to the loss of a significant part of our lives. It is not about forgetting either, or ‘just moving on’. It’s about how we come to live with a loss, and build our lives around the hole that is left.”

Bereavement counsellor Lianna Champ, author of How To Grieve Like A Champ, explains: “We value our work for a number of reasons – self-worth, it pays the bills, it gives us a purpose, we get a sense of achievement, and we often spend more time with our colleagues than our family.”

After redundancy, she says, “we need to grieve the loss for our normal routines and all that is familiar, as well as grieving for our friends and colleagues in the workplace”.

What to do in the immediate aftermath
Firstly, talk. “Sharing your feelings is central to grieving,” says Dr McLaren. “It’s okay to feel sad. It’s okay to remember the good times. Don’t pretend to yourself or others that it doesn’t matter. Let them know it does. Watch out for denial.”

Next, take care of yourself: eat well, exercise, sleep, relax, and avoid unhelpful coping mechanisms such as excess alcohol. Ms Champ says: “Take some ‘me time’. Spend time with people you love and do things that make you feel good about yourself.”

And combating any negative feelings that may arise about yourself is also key – this is a time for a good dose of self-love.

“It’s really challenging not to take it personally, especially if we’ve been committed and have given 100 per cent to our job. Self-doubt can creep in and make the future seem hopeless. [But] don’t let something bad make you lose sight of all that you have and all that you are,” she says.

How to move on
The loss of income may mean you need to get practical – find out how to claim assistance from the government and reach out if you’re unsure what financial help you’re entitled to or how to apply for it.

It might feel as if there’s nothing but never-ending time ahead, with the hole that losing your job leaves behind, but try to see this instead as an opportunity you might never have again.

“Factor your future planning into each day and have a structure. This will put meaning into your day and will create a sense of having done something positive. Sometimes, being forced out of our comfort zone can be just the kick we need,” suggests Ms Champ.

“Look at your contacts list and begin networking. Build on your CV and really think about the skills you have – not just in the workplace but your life skills too,” she adds.

You could also use the time for learning through an online course, or throw yourself into volunteer work.

“There is always something to do if we look,” says Ms Champ. “Have faith. Show the world that you can adapt and find excitement in the unknown – it could end up being a blessing in disguise.

“We have to let go of trying to control and intellectualise every aspect of our lives and become more fluid, especially when something drastic happens to us, like losing our job.”

Do you still work? Have you ever been made redundant?

– With PA

If you enjoy our content, don’t keep it to yourself. Share our free eNews with your friends and encourage them to sign up.

Join YourLifeChoices today
and get this free eBook!

Join
By joining YourLifeChoices you consent that you have read and agree to our Terms & Conditions and Privacy Policy

RELATED LINKS

Work longer, retire later: Australians anticipate a tough future

How the pandemic has changed our financial future.

How to assess if part-time work is right for you

Retired actuary John De Ravin crunches the numbers on part-time work to help you decide.

How to prepare if your job is shaky

Financial adviser Helen Baker tells what you should be doing.

0 Comments

Total Comments: 0

    FACEBOOK COMMENTS



    SPONSORED LINKS

    continue reading

    Health

    How to … fall back asleep

    Waking up at night and struggling to get back to sleep can be stressful and exhausting. According to WebMB, around...

    Uncategorized

    Curing the incurable: Why some patients make astounding recoveries

    As a GP and someone who works in the holistic health field, Dr Jerry Thompson has long been interested in...

    Uncategorized

    The 'ism' that's rife and no, it's not okay

    Ageism, like all 'isms', creates a social hierarchy and disadvantages people based on an aspect of their diversity. Compared to...

    Community

    When conversations become a competition

    Australia has a well-deserved reputation for being a very competitive nation on the world stage. Perhaps it dates back to...

    Uncategorized

    Wakey wakey - a history of alarm clocks

    Matthew S. Champion, Australian Catholic University Australians are returning to our normal rhythms. The first beats of the day are...

    Resources

    The top-selling-souvenir from every country in the world

    Do you buy souvenirs to remember your overseas holidays? If so, we imagine you have been looking at these very...

    COVID-19

    ACCC to keep a keen eye on travel issues this year

    Australia's consumer watchdog expects to have its hands busy dealing with COVID-affected travel complaints this year. In his annual address...

    Australia

    Cruisers turn to superyachts to satisfy their cruise cravings

    Typically, Australia is one of, if not, the biggest cruise market in the world. It wasn't so long ago that...

    LOADING MORE ARTICLE...