Ten questions raised by COVID-19

COVID-19 has come with its share of myth and mystery, so today irregular columnist Steve Perkin answers 10 questions raised by COVID-19 – as only he can.

1. Is it a scientific fact that one’s proficiency at jigsaw puzzles diminishes with age?
I bought a jigsaw to help kill ‘corona-boredom’ and I can sit looking at it for ages without adding a piece to the puzzle.

Along will come my 26-year-old son and he’ll drop in 10 pieces in 10 minutes.

I used to be quite good. Now I’m useless.

2. Where does all the glass come from that you find on a beach?
Yes, broken bottles, I know, but how does the bottle break and how long does it take to wash up?

And where have the bottles come from that I’m finding on my bayside beach in Melbourne, nearby or the other side of the bay?

I started collecting glass with my three-year-old grandson while we took our daily ‘coronawalks’ and together we’ll find 20 or 30 pieces each morning.

3. How many businesses will change the way they operate, thanks to this virus?
For example, bookshops may find they are too busy managing online sales to worry about having a retail outlet requiring staff and rental payments.

4. Will shaking hands become a thing of the past?
Seems to make sense that we eliminate handshakes forever, given you never know where the other person’s hand has been.

Elbow tapping might catch on.

As for the Maori nose-rubbing tradition, that must surely be dead in the water.

5. How many businesses are going to realise they can function perfectly well having staff work from home?
I have two family members working from home during this virus and it has made little or no difference to their output, although I think they’re both missing the office environment.

But if it’s going to save an employer money, surely it will become a requirement for getting a job.

6. How many pets will struggle once this lockdown ends?
I’ve got a cat and a dog that have loved having company 24/7, to say nothing of twice daily walks (dog) and heating on all day (cat).

7. When state borders open up again, is every grey nomad in Australia going to suddenly hit the road?
I know I am.

We had to postpone a month travelling through South Australia, but when the government gives me the green light, I’m up and out of here.

I can only assume there will be others like me.

8. When you’re allowed out, will you hug your grandchildren or maintain some social distancing?
I haven’t seen two of my four grandkids for four weeks. I’m going to hug them and to hell with the consequences.

9. If China discovers a cure for the coronavirus before anyone else, will they sell it to the rest of the world?
And will they make it available to America?

10. Will we see a resurgence of the beard?
Plenty of men have stopped shaving because they can’t be bothered doing it, so it’s to be assumed that some will prefer the hairy look and keep it, right?

What COVID-19 mysteries have you solved? What’s the biggest question left unanswered?

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Related articles:
Common COVID-19 questions
Coronavirus myths tackled
Benefits of COVID-19 lockdown

Written by Perko

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